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Steak, machine guns and empty wallets - perfect.

  • Jul 30, 2010
I take any excuse to go to Vegas: conferences, weddings, bachelor parties, "just passing through" - you name it. The first time I ever went, it remember thinking it was like somebody knew everything I liked and squeezed it into one city. Heaven would be Las Vegas with easier transport. While I'm not known for getting over excited, walking through a casino floor sometimes gives me that "OMG OMG!" feeling like a texting 15-year old. See, I'm even getting excited now and I haven't even had my afternoon coffee. OMG!

Ten Things You Should Do In Sin CIty
  1. Get a hotel with a beach: the Mandalay Bay has a beach - how many hotels can boast that? It also has a wave machine. A wave machine! In 100+ degree weather, sitting at one of the excellent pool areas in The Venetian or MGM Grand is really pretty pleasant, especially since the MGM only costs around $40 a night.
  2. Fire some machine guns: rock out with your Glock out! One of the fastest ways to drop $150 outside a casino, but one of the best ways to milk your immaturity and leave you grinning like a Cheshire cat. Uzi 9mm? No problem. M4? Sure. Squeeze the trigger and be shocked at how you can't even hold the thing as it sprays bullets the size of a fountain pen everywhere! Marvel at how grossly irresponsible this would be anywhere outside of Vegas. Ka-boom!
  3. Smith & Wollensky: there's the beef! Down the south end of the strip sits S&W, churning out plate after plate of phenomenal $29 rib-eyes and $15 lobster. $15 lobster? "Yes, that's right," as they say in commercials. It's like a half-price Morton's.
  4. See Lance Burton disappear before he disappears: ol' Lance is quitting his magic gig at the Monte Carlo soon. He's spectacularly good, and somehow peaks the interest of the audience's inner child, leaving everyone quite inspired and baffled. I'd love to know how the levitation worked considering I was 10 feet away.
  5. The Auto Collections at the Imperial Palace: the world's biggest collection of antique, luxury or modified vehicles, treading the line between museum, auction house and parking lot. Even if you're not a big car fan (count me in), it's impressive stuff and a one-of-a-kind place.
  6. P F Chang's in Planet Hollywood: amazingly, nothing like the other PFCs anywhere. Somehow
    the cooks feed a 400-seat restaurant from a kitchen smaller than the one in my apartment, and it's consistently good food. And Happy Hour from 3-6pm.
  7. Champagne Brunch at the Wynn: at around $35, it's easily the best buffet on the strip though not the cheapest. Stay away from the pasta, bread and any other carbohydrate diversion and get into smoked salmon, rack of lamb, prime rib and wash it down with bottomless glasses of bubbles. Make sure you haven't eat for 20 hours beforehand and be prepared to roll out 15 pounds heavier.
  8. Cirque du Soleil: the custom-designed theaters give you an excellent view from anywhere, and their performances are truly remarkable. It definitely makes you want to go to the gym more (but not on this vacation!).
  9. Breakfast at Bouchon in the Venetian: if Thomas Keller had been around in Roman Times, he would have been the living God of food. There's no better breakfast on the planet, and some of the signature dishes are spectacular (chicken waffles). 
  10. New York's roller coaster: as you're being chain-pulled up to the top, it's around half-way that the sheer height of the drop replaces sightseeing with utter terror. 67mph and 5,000 feet later, it conveniently drops you off near a bar that serves pretty decent happy hour Margaritas.
There's almost too much to even start gambling! Vegas, baby, yeah! OMG!
Steak, machine guns and empty wallets - perfect. Say hello to my little friend! No veggies needed. Lance Burton makes us all feel like kids again I can see the Statue of Liberty from here! Steak, machine guns and empty wallets - perfect. Steak, machine guns and empty wallets - perfect. Steak, machine guns and empty wallets - perfect. Steak, machine guns and empty wallets - perfect.

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April 22, 2011
Great review, J! I just had to like/share this with my Facebook peeps since most of them spend a LOT of time in Vegas, I'm sure this is going to be helpful. The other great pool area is at the Tropicana with super cheap rooms with the old school Vegas feel- a swim up black jack table doesn't hurt either!

I'm also thinking of taking a jaunt there for a mini-moon after the wedding, to catch an amazing show featuring the Jabbowackeez (a breakdancing crew that uses dance to tell stories). Thanks for sharing :)
April 22, 2011
Thanks! I could do with another trip to Vegas, but unfortunately Mrs Me doesn't approve. :-( I hear good things about the Jabbawockeez show...
April 22, 2011
Well, usually I'm with her- I'm not the biggest fan of Vegas (working at Harrah's in the entertainment department for 4 years will do that to you). But, I am looking forward to checking out the show!
April 22, 2011
I still want to see Phantom of the Opera there, and I'll love to stay at the new City Center. Plus i need a tan! :-D
April 22, 2011
I didn't know that Phantom was there....ooooh that's tied for my favorite musical of all time (with Fiddler).
October 27, 2010
I'm planning my next trip to Vegas as we speak and you've added several to-do items to my list. Thank you! I would like to add a #11. The bathrooms. They are plentiful, beautiful, and squeaky clean. The bathrooms were my very first favorite thing about Vegas. It might because I had recently returned from an extended vacation from France and Italy and boy oh boy are those bathrooms bad. I had no idea so many types of "toilets" existed. They are quite creative with the hole-in-the-ground model.
October 27, 2010
I hadn't thought about that but it's absolutely true - I don't remember ever seeing any sub-standard bathrooms in Vegas! You could practically live in the restrooms at the Wynn.
October 16, 2010
Great review. I was only here once and I didn't get to shoot any guns, I know that.
October 16, 2010
Thanks! I could be tempted to live in Vegas, but somehow I think the overload of awesomeness might take 10 years off my life.
October 17, 2010
Las Vegas to me because of all it offers is one of those places to visit and not live there. You WANT to come back, you WANT to see new things that show up there. Course the heat in the summer when I was there didn't help either.
August 08, 2010
Man, you make me wanna visit Vegas again! Use to go to Circus Circus every year as a kid, but as an adult, I've only ever gone there for work conventions. I've gotta go there purely for fun one of these days!
August 09, 2010
Yard-long margaritas all the way!
August 09, 2010
Yeah, that sounds like a terrible idea. ....Or is it the most awesome idea ever??? :P
August 09, 2010
I think it's the beginning of the sequel to The Hangover. I need to start convincing some of my friends to get married so I can get a bachelor party started!
August 01, 2010
This is certainly one place on the planet where you don't need to sleep and can stay awake without caffeine! ;-) Is that all? OMG! You haven't even got to the national parks around the city yet!!!
August 01, 2010
Yes - I think top 10 could easily become a top 100!
August 08, 2010
I, let's see I think I've done 50 things already in Vegas LOL!
More Las Vegas reviews
review by . May 03, 2009
The Sin City: I want to live here!
  Las Vegas as a city is easy to manouver. Get through the airport & in no time, you are in your hotel room! & I do mean in no time. The airport is right in the city! How many cities in U.S. has such easy access to the airport? Not many! And I don't mean places like Whites City. So, now that you are in your hotel, amazing, isn't it? I love the mega & absolutely opulent hotels here, especially those on the strip. You can do anything in your hotel room, but not out on the …
Quick Tip by . December 31, 2010
Las Vegas is fun & glitzy. It is a city of happenings and one of the greatest place to be during Christmas & New Year's Eve! I simply love all the nightlife and the national parks around this area. It has almost everything!
Quick Tip by . September 25, 2010
posted in Awesomeness
Huge city with plenty to do, but the glitz would wear thin and your best to just visit and not live there to keep it fresh.
Quick Tip by . February 02, 2010
It's one of the most vibrant cities in the U.S. & despite all its commercialism, I love it for a variety of reasons. Awesome entertainment!
review by . December 24, 2008
Vegas 1
Las Vegas, Nevada is probably the last place on earth I would want to take a vacation.  It is also one of the last places in America I would want to live  (Houston being the other).  While I have never been there I have seen and read enough over the years to know that I detest just about everything about it.   The lights, the noise, the gambling, the pollution, the congestion, most of the shows, and the sprawl simply don't interest me in the least.  I …
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James Beswick ()
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Las Vegas (Spanish: The Meadows) is the most populous city in the U.S. state of Nevada, the seat of Clark County, and an internationally renowned resort city for gambling, shopping, and entertainment. Las Vegas, billed as The Entertainment Capital of the World, is famous for the number of casino resorts and associated entertainment. A growing retirement and family city, it is the 28th most populous city in the United States with an estimated population by the U.S. Census Bureau of 558,880 as of 2007. The estimated population of the Las Vegas metropolitan area, which is the entirety of Clark County, was 1,836,333.

Established in 1905, Las Vegas officially became a city in 1911. With the growth that followed, at the close of the century Las Vegas was the most populous American city founded in the 20th century (a distinction held by Chicago in the 19th century). The city's tolerance for various forms of adult entertainment earned it the title of Sin City, and this image has made Las Vegas a popular setting for films and television programs. Outdoor lighting displays are everywhere on the Las Vegas Strip and are seen elsewhere in the city as well; as seen from space, Las Vegas is the brightest city on earth.

The name Las Vegas is often applied to unincorporated suburbs that surround the city, especially the resort areas on and near the Las Vegas Strip. This 4.5-mile (7.2-km) stretch of Las Vegas Boulevard is mostly outside the city limits, in the unincorporated ...
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