Last week, as I was shopping at Tarjay, a tub of Queen Helene hair cholesterol jumped out at me from the "Ethnic Hair Care" section. I mean, it was kind of hard to miss. Amongst the lush green, lavender, pink, etc, hair product packagings with fancy graphic design logos and beautiful hair models, Queen Helene's archaic looking jar was definitely there in spades. Its tub is like the beauty equivalent of say, a Maggi or Tabasco sauce bottle if you will. Truly old school and absolutely no-frills.
What's so significant about Queen Helene's hair cholesterol to me? I'm a big Augusten Burroughs fan, and in particular, a huge fan of his memoir Running with Scissors, and for some reason, he mentions Queen Helene hair cholesterol in his memoir A LOT. I was always a bit curious about it, but figured it probably wasn't in production anymore since I had never heard of it before and his book is set in the 80's. So finding it at Target totally caught me by surprise. As I examined the tub in the aisle of Target, I thought to myself, "Hmmm, found in the 'Ethnic Hair Care' section, seemingly highly recommended by a gay ex-wannabe hairdresser, and it only costs $2.49... Okay, I'm sold".
I followed the directions on the tub, which were shampoo, cover hair in hair cholesterol, put on shower cap, and wrap in hot towel. It suggested leaving it on for 15-30 minutes, but if you get enthralled in something, as I did (I watched Law & Order, Lunched, and eBayed!), it never hurts to leave it on for longer. After an hour, I rinsed and didn't shampoo as the directions instructed me not to do, and then dried it. My hair was... Okay. Definitely no miracle cream. I didn't understand why Augusten Burrough wrote about it so much, and why it was still around in 2009 if these were the results. Was I just using it wrong?
I had to consult my trusty ladies at MakeupAlley, and they had a thing or two to say about this product. The best sounding suggestion that I received was to add olive oil to it. So I decided to try the hair cholesterol once more. I debated between stirring olive oil into the tub, and applying olive oil directly to the ends of my hair and then covering it with the hair cholesterol. I decided on the latter because I figured the cream would lock in the olive oil. I went through the same routine again with this change, and when I dried my hair, it was silky smooth!
I give Queen Helene's Hair Cholesterol a +3 on its own and a +5 when used with olive oil, so I'm just going to average it out to a +4.
Random story: After my second try with Queen Helene's hair cholesterol, I just had to share with my mommy this hair product that I discovered that makes my hair all shiny and managable, "It's this stuff called Queen Helene's hair cholesterol and I use it with olive oil". My mom was like, "Queen Helene? I used to use that stuff by the gallon tubs back when I was a hairdresser in the early 80's". Then she went under her bathroom sink and pulled out this literally gallon tub of Queen Helene hair cholesterol, straight from the 80's (she never throws anything away!). Her tub looked EXACTLY like my tub, except on steroids. Too weird, too weird.
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