The Bottom Line: The bottom line is this is a stinko of a movie
Generally I like to start a review by giving props to the writer, director, etc., of a movie as well as list the rating and awards. But, seriously, does anyone give a flyin frig if I prop up these culprits that put out this lame movie, Frankenfish? You know how they always say "Only a mother could love it/him/her?" Seriously, I doubt if Ms. Dippe is sitting back saying, "well, dang, did ya see what my boy Mark put out?"
It isn't my place to really kick anyone to the curb when they do their life's work. It's a lot like religion. You may not follow a certain belief, or any belief, but it isn't for you to say those that do are wrong. It is their belief. So, when good old Mark Dippe set out to direct this movie, well, it was his life's work; how can I fault him? Are ya freakin crazy? This is pure double A+ schlock.
The story: John, good old boy, is tooling through the swamp pulling his crab traps. When one bobs away from him and he reaches for it ... well, it wasn't pretty folks and we are only 2 minutes into the movie. In another area a dead girl has been found. She's pretty racked up but it is the unusual teeth impressions on her that has the coroner, Sam, interested. Not that Sam is going to be able to pursue it, however, because the sheriff comes along and tells him he needs to head out to the swamp region to investigate a gruesome find.
What we find, housed in the cooler at the local deli mind you, is the torso, one arm, and head of good old boy, John. Poor soul. Even more intrigued by these bite marks, Sam calls in a marine bologist to go with him to the "kill site" to see what they can find out.
After a reluctant meeting with some locals on their houseboats moored in the middle of the swamp [WHY I ask], they finally meet up with Frankenfish - a genetically mutated snake fish. This is my second run-in with a movie dealing with snakefish, I'm thinking they are pretty nasty creatures. According to science or legend or lore, they are the only fish that actually hunts humans.
On the flip side of the coin we have - surprise - some rich dude that has lost a boat containing his prizes, which happen to be three of these dang altered snake fish. Discovering where his missing boat has gone aground, he sets out to find his treasures. And find them he does.
The actors: I'm not even going to go there. I will mention that Matthew Rauch who plays Dan, a really obnoxious bore, wore a ton of guyliner on his bottom lashes.
Starring - Tory Kittles, K.D. Aubert, China Chow, Matthew Rauch, plus CGI manufactured fish.
DVD extras: trailers
Overall impression: Trust mommy on this, just say no.
Rated R for a ton of gore, head-ripping off, bodies torn in half, buckets full of blood, and general dismembering. No awards. Written by Simon Barrett, Scott Clevenger.
FRANKINFISH Have you ever seen a movie and thought "man that was a far out there concept", and then thought "hey that was actually entertaining". Well if you have ever thought that then chances are you were talking about this flick right here. This movie despite having a funny yet horrible name is just one of those fun out there type of creature features in the same vein as "Lake Placid" [the first one]. I remember … more
Writers Scott Clevenger, Simon Barrett came up with a really entertaining film and director Mark A.Z. Dippé really delivered with their idea and crafted a pretty entertaining movie. This is not a classic film but it is a cool movie, it is full of cheese and is a true b movie but it is a good flick. Watch this on a Saturday afternoon or night and grab the pizza.
The follow-up from Mark A.Z. Dippe, FRANKENFISH stars Muse Watson (I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER) and Tory Kittles in a story that pits a pack of huge, mutant, flesh-eating fish against the human inhabitants of a Bayou town. A genetic engineering experiment gone horribly awry, these monsters are the result of a cross between a fish and a snake, and can travel on land as well as swim, and they have a taste for blood, leaving a trail of gruesome corpses up and down the river. The local authorities don't realize what they are up against before the death toll mounts considerable, and by then it may just be too late to stop the creatures.