¡NINGUNA DELICADEZA EN ABSOLUTO!!!!

As this movie starts, you know subtlety is not it's strong point if a point at all.  Danny Trejo and some sidekick are cops who are being warned not to go after a kidnapped girl in a drug lord's house.  Trejo ignores this command by crushing the radio with his hand.  Going full speed in some decepit looking sedan, and heres where this movie shows off that deficency in subtlety.  Storming the house by ramming the car through the front, three guards with automatic rifles pepper the car with lead, the car kills the guards but the guards kill turn the sidekick into bloody swiss cheese-but thats not the outragous part, Trejo-known as Machete proceeds to kill and behead with said blade more guards inculding the HAND of a guard and uses a revolver with chopped off hand attached to shoot more guards but THAT isn't the outrageous part, spins like a cyclone and beheads MORE guards in bloody fashion but NO still not the outrageous part, he then casually walks in on a nude and nubile hostage but THEN the outrageous part comes, the girl gets a call on her cell phone.

"But if shes nude, where was she keeping the cell ph...............................oh."

Indeed.  You just saw bloody shooting, beheadings and violence and it's THAT scene that stunned me.
This movie is great.

Machete is for sure on par with The Expendables for most awesome movie of the summer.  NO I didn't say the best movie or most dramatic movie or movie that you need 3 braincells to figure things out and then award Oscar noms to, I said most awesome movie.  From head to toe Machete has Robert Rodriguez's talents to the hilt and using movie tough guy Danny Trejo as the lead in this movie about corrupt senators, illegal immigration and boatloads of action with plenty of foxy girls like Jessica Alba and Michelle Rodriguez kicking butt in action scenes along with Lindsay Lohan as a slutty daughter of a senator's aide who spends most of her time getting wasted and acting like a slattern.  I'm sure theres a joke to be made there.

Entertained?  YES!  If you like your action fast and gory then this is your movie.  If you want love and romance, high drama and high emotion then you are in the wrong movie friend.  Action, fast furious and take no prisoners.  As sure as Danny Trejo's face looks like a worn catcher's mitt and whose breath reaks of hard booze by the end of this movie after all that goes down, YES this movie is action and is you like that I'm sure you will be entertained.

This movie, as soon as I saw a commerical for it, I knew what it was, what it would have and that I was going to see it.  I walked out of the theater happy knowing it didn't rob me or lie to me since it was exactly what it said on the tin.

This movie is out now and with a big name director and cast that includes Robert DeNiro and Jessica Alba, you can be sure it will stay mainstream.

This is a +5 for me.  I wanted action it gave me action.  It didn't try and sneak things in under the table and while you can make points about the Mexican Illeagal Immigration issue and drug trafficking, the point characters make is that the there is a law, but those laws are set up by the failed system that failed the people and before you go making a point out of that, just remember that the final shoot out includes a gang of bubba redneck Americans in camo and Humvees facing down a fleet of Mexican day laborers in low riders complete with gaudy sparkle paint jobs and armed with weedwhackers and hoes.  SUBTLE!!

At 66, Danny Trejo rocked this movie and tole me how many other great movies he could have helmed had he been the star.  Machete will be back and I will be back to see him in theatres saying "Hi Machete!"

Unless of course I was Jessica Alba, then it's "Match - et - AY."