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Transformers: Dark of the Moon

A movie directed by Michael Bay

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Like a Lullaby, kinda.

  • Jul 2, 2011
Written by Ehren Kruger
Directed by Michael Bay
Starring Shia LaBeouf, Josh Duhamel, John Turturro, Frances McDormand, Patrick Dempsey and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
Simmons: Years from now, they’re going to ask, “Where were you when they took over the planet?” We’re going to say, “We just stood by and watched.”
Before today, I would never have equated Michael Bay’s directorial style with the soothing effect of a lullaby but that was before seeing TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON. It’s not that the barrage of intergalactic explosions of metal and mayhem that make up the majority of the third entry in the franchise would necessarily put you to sleep; it’s just that after sitting through Bay’s interpretation of the TRANSFORMERS universe three times now has lulled me into a state of acceptance. I’ve never loved his vision for their world, which was a favorite of mine growing up, but I’ve now recognized that it is what it is and it isn’t about to change either.  This shift allowed for me to see the latest installment as also the greatest.
Keep in mind that being called the best TRANSFORMERS movie to date is hardly a compliment given the history. Many of the essentials from the past make their inevitable returns this time out. Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is back as friend to the Autobots and general all-around neurotic player with a giant chip in his shoulder. He now feels, like most of his youthful colleagues coming out of college, that he is entitled to great things right now with no dues to pay. Of course, he already has great things like doting parents (Kevin Dunn and Julie White) and an impossibly attractive new girlfriend, Carly (model, Rosie Huntingdon-Whitely, in her first and hopefully last acting role) but if he doesn’t have the fancy car and hot shot job to go with, then he might as well announce to the world that he is in fact not an actual man. Having saved the world twice already only serves to exacerbate his ego driven anxiety. Sam is stunted but that isn’t surprising given who the direction is coming from.
Part of the reason TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON works better is because it is more solidly grounded in reality from the start. Writer, Ehren Kruger (who also co-wrote REVENGE OF THE FALLEN) integrates Cybertronian lore into actual human history, having an Autobot vessel crash on the moon in the early 1960’s. The space race is then rewritten as a means to get to that ship first, which of course the Americans do. He then follows that up with some reasonably compelling betrayals amongst the Transformer ranks that will certainly appeal to longtime fans. Unfortunately, he fills the rest of the space with the usual misogynistic boyhood fantasies that Bay gets off on so bad. What you’re left with is a slightly more elevated and enjoyable experience that stems from a simple numbing of the senses. And when you wake from the dream, you may still long for what it could have been.
Like, since when is Shockwave not a clunker of a boom box?

Thanks for reading.
LUNCH rating is out of 10.

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To read the reviews of the previous TRANSFORMER films, click the links in the review.
Like a Lullaby, kinda. Like a Lullaby, kinda. Like a Lullaby, kinda.

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July 02, 2011
"...rest of the space with the usual misogynistic boyhood fantasies that Bay gets off on so bad" well said. You nailed everything I felt with that line. It was just so excessive and Bay could've cut it by 40 minutes and the film would've been better.
July 08, 2011
I didn't find any more or less excessive than the first two though .. or any other Michael Bay film for that matter. At least the 3D was solid.
More Transformers: Dark of the Moon reviews
review by . July 01, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
Too Much Excessive, Inane Issues Hamper The Potential Gritty Appeal of The Robot Fights...
Allow me to re-elaborate how I felt about the first two films in the “Transformers” saga directed by Michael Bay and co-produced by Steven Spielberg. I know that the films were never faithful to the cartoon series nor to the 80’s comic books, but we have to remember that those two installments were made to promote a toy line from Hasbro and so all three films have the label “based on the Hasbro toys“ and this trilogy of films were made to sell more toys. The first …
review by . June 29, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
There is something to admire about Michael Bay.  He makes the movies he wants to make and doesn't care what the critics or anyone else thinks.  He knows exactly what his fans want and always manages to deliver on that front.  There is something quite admirable about a man who wants to simply sit back and make senseless movies.  That's actually not an insult, it's a compliment.  That doesn't mean I like Michael Bay movies, but it does mean that I have no big …
review by . July 08, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
As the Transformers movies went on, they got better and better each time for one reason, the humans got pushed to the background and we got to see more Transformers, more action and more excitement.  The first movie took it's damn time getting the Transformers out there with only glimpses of them here and there before a great action finale.  The second one, while maligned by many for many good reasons of too much comic relief, creaky story telling and broad racial stereotypes at least …
review by . June 29, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
   Dark of the Moon was one of the most anticipated summer movies because it announced the closing, the ending, the final venture of this human and alien robots story. The last movie was pretty much acknowledged as a total catastrophe by the critics and cinephiles around the globe even though it scored highly at the box-office (like that really matters when judging quality). It was built on pure non-sense defining the point-less action movies of this generation. However, everyone turned …
review by . June 30, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
Star Rating:         Why are they still making these movies? If you even think of coming back at me with, “Because they make money,” you no longer have permission to read my reviews. Even escapist movies that require no thought and have no message to send deserve good characters and decent dialogue, and they should at the very least be entertaining. Is that really so hard? For Michael Bay and his crew, especially his screenwriters, the answer is apparently …
review by . June 29, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
I don't believe Michael Bay has ever met a special effect he didn't like or an object he didn't want to blow up. For those fans of Michael Bay you are gonna get more of the same, maybe even a little darker than his attempts before. For those of you who are fans of non-stop action and that is all you need from a movie than by all means stop reading here and enjoy the film. I am not a Michael Bay fan and maybe that bias gets in the way, but good lord was this a dumb movie.   …
review by . June 29, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
Transformers-Dark Of The Moon' 'Two Jews On Film' Are On Different Planets With This One (Video)
   By Joan Alperin Schwartz      'Transformers - Dark Of The Moon' presented in 3D is directed by Michael Bay.      First, I'll start with the good stuff.  And yes, there is 'good stuff'.  In fact, I think this is the best 'Transformers' of the series...which may or may not be saying much...depending on how you felt about the other two.      Here it goes...In no particular order...What I liked …
review by . June 29, 2011
First off I should preface this by confessing that I am a big transformers fan: 1) I blame my brother for introducing me to the cartoon series at a young age and 2) I blame Michael Bay for making it look so badass to be a transforming robot.  I mean, let’s be honest here, Bay has created three films for a franchise that can now continue to grow by showing younger generations that “old” cartoons make for some pretty cool stories (and toys).      Granted, …
review by . July 05, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
15 - 157mins - Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi - 29th June 2011   Our summer of sequels continues with the Transformers returning to the big screen with their third outing. After the rather disappointing Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen I have to say that my hopes were not particularly high for this one.    Dark of the Moon is set several years after the second movie where Sam (Shia LaBeouf) is struggling to get a job and return his life to normal and yet this still hasn't stopped …
review by . July 07, 2011
posted in Movie Hype
Its the 1986 movie meets Revenge of the fallen.
A few months after Revenge of the Fallen hit theaters numerous rumors started to pop up about the third film in the franchise. One of the most prominent of them being that the Decepticon Unicron was going to be the featured antagonist. Although it was just a rumor it still got me super excited about this film. Even though i eventually found out Unicron wasn't going to be in the film the trailers and the supposed invasion of earth story line filled that gap.      Transformers …
About the reviewer
Joseph Belanger ()
Hello Lunchers. I am a thirty-something guy making his way in Toronto. I am a banker by day and a film critic the rest of the time. Sensitive, sharp and sarcastic are just a few words that start with … more
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Transformers: Dark of the Moon is the third and final film in the Transformers film series, directed by Michael Bay and produced by Steven Spielberg. It is the sequel to Transformers and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and is scheduled for release on July 1, 2011, in Real D 3D, regular 2D theaters and IMAX.[1]

Shia LaBeouf, Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson and John Turturro are set to reprise their starring roles, with Peter Cullen returning as the voice of Optimus Prime. Ehren Kruger, who collaborated in the writing of the second film, was said to be again involved in the writing. Despite having initially been confirmed for the film,[2] and with the film already into principal photography, it was announced that Megan Fox would not be reprising her role from the previous two films. With Fox's character Mikaela being dropped, Sam was assigned a new love interest, who will be played by English model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. Also, Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman, having written the first two films, will not return for the third installment in the series,[3] which Orci had earlier somewhat anticipated, fearing the duo would "risk getting stale".[4] Bay has stated this would be his last installment in the series.[5]

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Director: Michael Bay
Genre: Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
Release Date: 1 July 2011 (USA)
Screen Writer: Ehren Kruger
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