Getting Started
Hopefully, your ears are already pierced. We'll assume that they are, but if not, obviously, get them pierced and allow them to heal before attempting to stretch out the piercings.
Start by wearing earrings every day for at least a week. Just regular hoops are okay if you haven't worn any in a while, but dangly and heavy is best to gently begin to stretch them. You can even try wearing two or more pairs at once, if that helps.
Alternately, you can choose to start with some of the patí coconut pieces available from Coco Loco Jewelry. These adorable and affordable pieces are some of my favorites, and because of the thick posts, they're perfect to ease into the stretching process.
While you are beginning to stretch your piercings, scout around piercings shops and funky boutiques for some small gauge pieces you'd like to wear. Reputable shops won't let you try on jewelry for sanitary reasons. This is good for combating the spread of disease, but bad if you're not sure what size gauge to wear.
It's hard to guess any given piece's gauge, especially with natural materials such as bone or wood, but the shop should be able to tell you. Don't start with anything over a twelve. When in doubt, use this rule of thumb, literally: don't start with any piece that you can't tuck into the crevice between your fingernail and the pad of your finger.
Slowly, Slowly...
Now comes the potentially painful part. The goal in this process is the stretch gradually to avoid tearing and subsequent bleeding. For me, every time my piercings bled it seemed to set me back at least a few days in my progress. So don't rush it.
Use h2ocean to clean your jewelry and piercings and resist the urge to pick at any crusty parts. If crustiness develops, wet a clean (preferably lint-free) cloth in h2ocean and soak the area, applying gentle pressure until the crustiness is gone. Bear in mind that this crusty material is actually dried pus that has come from your ears. While it is normal, it is an indication that the wound has not yet healed and must be kept perfectly clean.
It's pretty much downhill from here, depending on how far you want to go. I stretched my ears up to a double-zero, which is about big enough to insert a pencil through. These days, my ears are at about a ten, only because that's the size of my favorite pieces, a simple stainless steel set.
Finding Good Jewelry
The hard part is finding affordable jewelry. Coco Loco has a huge selection of gauged pieces and I've been very happy with a pair I bought from them at a street fair a few years back. Plus, they're remarkably inexpensive, which is rare for this type of jewelry. I've found several of my favorite pieces at Buffalo Exchange, a nationwide chain of re-sale shops. If you happen to find a pair of second-hand pieces, please be sure to sterilize them adequately, just in case (I'm usually comfortable with soaking overnight in peroxide or rubbing alcohol) and be wary of natural materials, as the porous surfaces may harbor germs that glass and metal won't. Hot Topic is a surprisingly good place to get cheap and simple gauged pieces as well, especially since they mark all their clearance items to sell fast.
What Not To Do
Whatever you do, don't go to a piercing shop and get stretched. This is an unnecessarily painful and expensive process and is something of a racket, since you are expected to pay for the service of having your piercings forced open one or two sizes at once, for jewelry, and to tip the piercer on top of all that.
A few more random tips...
Glass and metal pieces tend to slide around alot. You can buy small rubber pieces to hold them in place, but I think these look inelegant on some pieces and are really no better than using tiny clear plastic hair bands, sometimes one or two in the same spot.
Take your pieces out before you shower, especially with glass or jade pieces. This is a tragic way to lose what can be very expensive jewelry.
At Work
Some folks are hesitant to stretch their ears because such jewelry is frowned upon in their workplace. If this is the case for you, there are many types of split expanders, which are actually made of three pieces, one for behind your earlobe, one for the front, and a skinny post that connects the two to give the illusion of a larger piece.
