Valentine's Day

I've never been a fan of Valentine's Day, definitely not when I was single and not even now as I'm engaged to the love of my life. I always found it ridiculous that people needed a holiday to profess their love to each other. I'd much rather you buy me flowers on a Tuesday because you're thinking of me, not because Hallmark tells you that you have to do it. Love, like life, should be celebrated every day.

Valentine's does nothing but, make people feel less than great. I've known single women that have gone to great lengths to find a date, just for Valentine's Day- so that they wouldn't be alone. They inspired me to start the anti-VD celebration in which I celebrated being single and all the wonderfulness it entails. I still celebrate anti-VD because I don't celebrate a "holiday" that makes people feel like something's wrong with them if they're not in a committed relationship or have a date or happen to be alone.

I say, if you're a couple- celebrate your love often, show your appreciation for each other on those random days when you're loved one crosses your mind. Pick a flower, make dinner, write them a letter...because you WANT to, not because you HAVE to.

If you're single- grab onto my anti-VD stance and go out with a bunch of your friends, celebrate the fact that you are fabulous just the way you are and have a blast. You don't need to scour the world and the Net trying to find a date to make you feel less suicidal on a Hallmark holiday.

True love will give you the inspiration to be a better person or make you feel better about yourself every day of your life, not just on February 14.

Some dislikes it for its commercial aspects, some for its showy aspect, some for the simple reason that there is no one to celebrate it with.

Valentine's Day is not about having to prove one's love. It is not about having to spend the evening with candlelight dinner nor is it about boxes of chocolates. It is about having someone to love and someone to share intimacy with. The story begins with a single kiss... & where all that may leads.



To have someone to love is not just about love, but also about life. We are born and meant to love that special someone out there. It may be more than once and at times it may not last. However, love is not about commitment or about marriage. Love simply is ...

I like Valentine's Day for the fact that it serves as a reminder to us (hehe... some of us can be very forgetful while some are stone, without a reminder of it, we simply drift along... not giving the day any thought but simply move along like we do every single day of our lives). A reminder that we should pay tribute to that special someone who makes our lives a better one, a meaningful one and a delightful one. Giving gifts is an act of love. It is not commercialization. Gifts may come in many forms depending on the giver and what his/her loved one likes. It may be a poem, it may be a kiss, it may be a breakfast, it may simply be time spent together. Whatever it is, Valentine's Day is the day you pay special attention and focus on that special someone.

I found this sexy video on the net. Whatever you do guys, don't forget Valentine's Day! ;-)


Don't Forget Valentine's Day - Watch more Funny Videos

So Valentine's Day is coming up and while I've always been indifferent about the day, I am usually annoyed by some of the people on the day.  Now I know what you're thinking, "The people who are all sucking face and making cute noises to one another and the married couples who put on their Calender that this is one of the days of the year they're actually allowed to have sex with one another... yeah they annoy the hell out of me too!"  Actually, no.  I rather adore those people because they're not sitting around and bitching about how they have no one and how Valentine's Day is just a day made up to sell cards.  And it's true, a lot of people use Valentine's Day as a a day to sell cards.  But for those who actually have someone special (or who want to admit their feelings to someone special) it becomes a very special day and for some of them it's a lot ore than just a Halmark Holiday or a day to give your significant other an excuse to have sex (hey don't get mad, those people, sadly, do exist).

Your fellow Luncher Sean Rhodes doesn't have much of a love life here, neither is he really seeking one.  I don't want to rant, but those who rally against Valentine's Day because it's a cheesy, sappy holiday or because they're single are actually a little creepy to me (plus, if you're going to go into Valentine's Day with that kind of attitude it's no wonder you're still single).  I'm actually okay with being single or with just looking at others express their love on V-Day.  This is coming from someone who at 23 has only actually ever had two Valentine's Day with someone ever... both in high school and let me tell you that it's nothing to write home about, especially because a lot of high school relationshps are formed to end anyway.  And I'll admit that when I was younger I had my "Love sucks" moment and my disdain towards Valentine's Day as well.  And hey, you're free to have your own disdain toward Valentine's Day and hate it all you want and shit on people who enjoy it.  On the internet they're called trolls.  In real life they're called dicks.

Moving on, I will agree that yeah... do you really need a day to express your love for someone?  Well, in all honesty... no.  But to be honest with you we have A LOT of holidays that are used as excuses to do other things.  We use Saint Patrick's Day as an excuse to get hammered, for example.  We really do.  When Saint Patrick's Day comes around I'm always hearing, "Dude, I'm going to go out and get so fucked up I'll feel like I've downed roofies!"  Keep in mind... I'm in my twenties and am in college with people who insist that everyday is a good drinking day.   And it's not like they couldn't do it on the weekend or even on the Friday after work or classes.  Or even on some other holiday.  Christmas slowly became a material holiday where people are more concerned about what they'll get than anything else.  So in the sense of Valentine's Day being a Holiday that we don't really need just because no one needs an excuse to express their love... you might want to consider what other people use other holidays as an excuse to do as well.  Do you really, for example, need a holiday to express how Thankful you are for what you have?  Do you need a holiday or even a birthday as an excuse to give someone a gift?  Do you really need say... Labor Day as an excuse to take another day off work (or MLK Day, President's Day etc.)?  There were a bunch of kids whining about how we don't get "Patriot Day" off school.  You guys know what day "Patriot Day" is?  It's September 11.  In short, I can't get upset about people using Valentine's Day as an excuse when people are convinced we need to make days like September 11 or April 20 (Columbine) a Holiday just so that we can have an excuse to have another day off.  Sain't Patrick's Day and New Year's are primarily drinking Holidays among large groups of people.  With that in mind... why can't Valentine's Day be a Holiday?  Even with it being used as an excuse to express your love when you can do it any other day?  You can drink any other day.  Give thanks any other day.  Give a gift any other day.  Be thankful for your civil rights any other day.  And what the hell was the point of Labor Day again?

I know there are more significant meanings behind days such as Thanksgiving, Christmas etc.  I'm only saying that while they are not forgotten... deep down inside people are much happier about other things concerning those days rather than their actual meaning.  On Thanksgiving it's that feast and (for many) that nice long weekend.  For Christmas it's receiving gifts.  There are deeper meanings to these Holidays but you don't necessarily need Thanksgiving to have a feast or Christmas to give a gift. But those Holidays did turn into excuses for many to do just that.  I'm willing to bet there are people out there who don't even know what the hell the point of Labor Day is, but they'll take it as an excuse to have a day off. 

So Valentine's Day is a day where you express your love... even though you could express your love to someone on any other day of the year.  But hey, like I said, many Holidays devolved into being excuses as well.  Whether it's for a day off (there's one in every month) or just to give you an excuse to be an idiot or a jerk for a day (April Fool's Day) or what have you. 

I like V-Day.  I do get a lot of nice gifts from friends who insist on constantly reminding me that they care about me, and I'll do the same for many of them.  About the only thing that bothers me about Valentine's Day is really those who get bitter about it.  Most times that wouldn't bother me, but on Valentine's Day I'll get flooded with text messages and have to listen to angry rants all day long about how much Valentine's Day sucks.  For a time it was amusing because I used to be one of those people who thought the same.  Then it became sad.  Then it became stupid.  Then it became annoying.  I'll admit that I enjoy receiving the gifts, the candy and the chocolate.  And I admit I wonder how come people don't give me that stuff more.  But then again, I also wondered why Valentine's Day is the day of scrutiny.  In high school the annoyance was at its higheset.  With people sulking around because they had no one (cry me a river, build a bridge and get over it).  I had one friend in particular who was so over-dramatic about it that he made it a point to be silent and bitter all day.  He was like Scrooge if Scrooge were late to take a piss on Christmas and needed some other day to do it on.  When I got him a box of Chocolates one year he was suddenly... brighter and more cheery and happy.  So was it because he didn't have a special someone or because no one showed him some love?  Like I said, I can only remember having someone on V-day twice in my life and one of those times was a terrible experience anyway.  But I receive a lot of love every year.  

I don't care much for a love life, but nothing gets me more upset than someone else who has to ruin the love two other people express, and nothing gets to me more than the people who talk about how Valentine's Day is just another day... when it clearly isn't to them.  If it were the rage wouldn't be necessary on a day that was essentially "just like any other day."  Admit it, someimes people sucking face and expressing love to an over-the-top degree is a little off putting.  Especially on a day that pretty much encourages people to do it.  I'll be the first to admit that it can be.  I find it cute, but sometimes I think to myself, "Wow that guy hasn't gotten any in a long time if he's making her a feast, gave her a giant diamond ring, a giant teddy bear, a giant box of chocolates AND resurrected Barry White to sing love songs to her.  He's just doing this because afterwards... she'll pretty much have to."  I kid, of course, but seriously, I can sympathize with that kind of thinking.  It's especially hard on some when they're single and seeing people expressing such love when you have no one to express it to.  For others it can be a terrible reminder that at one point they DID have someone like that but no longer do.  This is part of the reason why some people don't call it "Valentine's Day," but rather "Single Awareness Day."  If that's not a big hint that some don't like being single on a day that's all about expressing your love for someone I don't know what is.  So while I don't want to hear the ramblings about it I can actually sympathize... even if I just don't feel that anymore. 

I do enjoy Valentine's Day.  Even though I don't have anyone.  But then again, I don't care much for a love life anyway.  But it is nice to go out on Valentine's Day and know that I am loved by someone out there.  A friend... a family member.  Hell, I'm even glad to receive those stupid cards from businesses on V-Day that basically just love me for giving them money.  I gotta say, I like that acknowledgement.  It gives me  makes me feel good for the day.  Hey, I don't get that on any day other than Valentine's Day... and yeah, I kind of like that.  I have a large network of friends.  And while we show our appreciation and love for one another in other ways, Valentine's Day is that day when we kind of make sure to remind each other that it's about more than friendship.  That's not to say we sit in a circle by the campfire singing songs or that no one ever gets pissed off with one another.  It is to say, however, that Valentine's Day among us isn't just another day.  Valentine's Day doesn't have to be about your love for that ONE special person, be it a spouse or a mother or a father... brother or sister or anything like that.  Sometimes the love of a friend is enough.  Like it was for my friend in high school who's real reason for not liking Valentine's Day was that no one EVER showed him love... even on days that WEREN'T Valentine's Day until I decided I'd get him a box of chocolates.  It suddenly brightened his day.  So you can say Valentine's Day is meaningless all you want, but to someone out there it really does mean something.  If you have someone who rather likes that expression of love on that day you probably know this much better than I do.  I'm not sitting here trying to defend Valentine's Day.  Only trying to provide you with perspective.  I rather enjoy the day because of that acknowledgement.  Just remember, it doesn't have to come from that specific special someone.  It can come from... well, anyone.  I think you'd be surprised how many people will be appreciative of what you give them on Valentine's Day.

I know that Valentine's Day seems meaningless to a lot of people.  But if you're with someone who rather enjoys giving that expression of love on that day... you definitely know that some of them would wring your neck if they found you didn't do anything for them on that day.  So much for being meaningless, right?  Just remember, what's meaningless to one may not be so meaningless to another.  So we don't really need a special day to tell someone we love them... but that doesn't make that day in and of itself useless.  I mean, come on, look at what we turned other Holidays into an excuse to do in spite of their meaning.

I'll spend this upcoming Valentine's Day single, but for the most part what would bother me more is letting it go by without actually expressing to my friends and family that I care about them and love them very much, and neglecting to show them my appreciation.  I know my friends feel the same way.  And yes, they all know already... but you'd be surprised how upset some of them can get when no one stops by to let them know how loved they really are.  I'm not one of those "Love Conquers All," people, but being bitter on Valentine's Day is no reason to make sure someone else has a bad day... and gives you no reason to crap on it either.  You can come up with all the excuses you want and bash on the day all you want, but if you've got that special someone who is looking forward to it, my guess is you're not going to turn your back on that special someone just because you don't like the day.  And my other guess is that you're not going to turn your back on any gift you should receive as well.  If that IS you, then I think you'll find that even you're getting something out of Valentine's Day.

Anyway, I'm excited for the day because to me it holds some special significance.  I hope you all have a Happy Valentine's Day as well.  Don't worry, even if you don't I'll still love you.

For a whole  24 hours those in love, lust, denial, acceptance and forgiveness celebrated Valentine's Day. And there isn't a place you can go to escape it. Every place I turned I saw hearts, flowers and goofy-grinned couples.

Pairs were everywhere and in everything: A tow-truck pulling a car, men and women, men and men, women and women, candy and flowers, a construction worker hammering a nail (that may have been a three-some, but you get the point). Hell, even the bums in the neighborhood were in pairs.

Oh, how I do detest VD day, and yes I know that's redundant.  This horrible man-made holiday that forces its love on people can only be compared to an unwanted venereal disease. Thanks Hallmark!

Apparently, I am the only one in a 25-mile radius that is alone and that's fine by me! But with all the added pressure of the day, I need a drink in a dive bar.

I ordered a foamy beer beside my turkey burger and fries and just as I begin to drink, the bar wench returns with another beer.

"I have one already," I let her know while taking a sip.

"Oh, I know," she said. "But I almost forgot. It's two for one all day. Enjoy!" she says wearing a big cheesy I-just-got-the-most-thoughtful-card-from-my-boyfriend grin.

Great, even at lunch I'm a fifth wheel.

As you may have guessed, I'm single. Actually, I'm sensationally single and damnit and I don't have to justify that to anyone.

Nor do I have to be made to feel inferior by those smug couples. You know the couples that, suddenly, are so much in love today.

SHE seems to have forgotten when he blew off meeting he mom because of something called, "Fantasy Football", while HE has forgotten the fact she calls him 37 times a day.

Together they seemed to forget how his ex still calls him, but he swears she's just a psycho-bitch ex- girlfriend (funny, how men coined any ex as a psycho-bitch), but since he brought a card at Walgreens, all is well.

And let's not forget the candy and something equally as lame as the crap you got from High School, like a stuffed teddy bear and a giant heart balloon and that somehow makes it acceptable, because its Valentines Day. Giant heart balloons, like Crocs, are never acceptable.

I remember when some friends and I gathered to make me feel better after the man I was dating felt the pressure of the five-month-old relationship and disappeared. Obviously with same cloak of invisibility my last boyfriend used.

He's such an asshole," Stacy said while looking at his picture on my cell phone.

"Lemme see this ass-wipe," Becky said while grabbing the cell phone. Totally unaware she just cancelled out Stacey's remark.

I point this out, the coalition looks at me and calls me all sorts of nerd, and dork and I believe I heard writer-geek.

"Let's just agree he's an ass," Stacey concludes.

"Kind of cute though," Becky quips.

The collective stare of single women burns holes in Becky.

"But, he's still a dick," she answers, blowing the whole asshole/asswipe thing again. This time I keep it to myself.

It's fine. He's off doing whatever asshole/asswipe/dicks do, when not in relationships. I of course have eaten 2 pints of ice cream (Buy one get one free special), joined Women's Boxing, cleaned out my closet and rearranged my bedroom incidentally finding a five-year-old gift certificate to a bookstore.

I'd go see if its still valid, but I may run into some cutesy couple at the store reading a book together.

"Are you ready to turn the page, sweetie?" he'll ask.

"Yes, dear," she'll reply.

"Can I turn it then, sweetie?" he'll continue.

"Yes, dear," she'll smile.

"Good, because I couldn't bear if you got a paper cut." he'll say with as much concern as to sound genuine and not like some guy that figures he should at least get a blowjob today.

And they'll smile.

I'll just stay indoors, because I'd have to kill said couple, get sent to prison and be paired up with my new cellmate, Big Bertha, who undoubtedly make me her bitch and I will have to smuggle in heart-shaped candies (Ouch) this time next year because she'll like Valentines Day, as she has been programmed to do.

Personally, I blame Disney and Hallmark.

"F you Disney and Hallmark!" I say aloud to no one in particular, which reminds me I need to stop talking to myself, because my cat obviously doesn't care.

I poured some Pinot, ate some Popcorn (and while the 'P's don't make it right, it makes me happy) and I settled in to watch some DVR'd episodes of CSI.

It's the one where the CSI gang finds the old lady three days dead in her kitchen being eaten by her cats. I shut off the TV.

It's official. I know when I'm beat. The universe is against me. Time to put an end to this day, I shake out two sleeping pills, "Oh, no I'm not gonna be a third wheel in my own bed." I think to myself, because the cat still couldn't care less, plus now I know he'll eat me if it comes down to it.

I put one pill back in the bottle to truly make it a pair: Just my sleeping pill and me. Because hey, pharmaceutical drugs are the only way to ward off VDs.

The first time after 57 years that VD falls on the same day as Chinese New Year! What a special Feb. 14 this is! The next time? 38 yrs later

True love is unconditional, a sacrifice and compromise, not flowers and candy one day a year. I don't buy the hype :)

I love the meaning & history of this holiday, but I hate what commercialization has done to it.