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Burning Palms (2010)

1 rating: -3.0
A movie directed by Christopher Landon

You've never experienced a movie likeBurning Palms; five stories so twisted, they could only take place in Los Angeles. A father's relationship with his precocious teenage daughter is too close for comfort for his fiancée. A woman becomes undone … see full wiki

Tags: Movies
Director: Christopher Landon
1 review about Burning Palms (2010)

Stupid, brutal and ugly.

  • Aug 30, 2011
Rating:
-3
Dear Amazon -

I have been a loyal user of your site for some time. I use it for just about any purchases, save for food. It's quick, it's easy and it's usually pretty cheap. With Amazon Prime, I've gotten the bonus of streaming video, plus free two day shipping, and with Amazon Vine I've been able to really stretch my legs as a reviewer.

And it's about the reviewing process I'm writing to you. See, I foolishly choose this movie, "Burning Palms," as a review item for Amazon Vine. Silly me, I know. I should have been put off by the description, but, well, when one is in a hurry to pick good things before they're gone, one sometimes acts in haste.

This movie is truly awful. I cannot think of a single good thing to say about it, aside from the fact that several of the actors are quite good in their very limited roles. Really, though, their presence in this film is just a waste of talent, and given the talent on display, I'm shocked they're in this film. This is the kind of film that should be held up in film making courses as an example of what not to do when it comes to making an indie movie.

The movie tells five "stories" about people in Los Angeles, which, as we know from every indie film ever made, is a festering hole of a city with nothing good going for it. Having actually spent time living in LA this is news to me, but there you go. Anyhow, each of these "stories" are about something going horribly wrong in people's lives and them dealing with the fallout. The story usually ends with an "ironic" "twist" "ending", that really doesn't do much to demonstrate any story-telling ability on the part of the writer. Each and every story had me constantly rolling my eyes, and occasionally out loud saying, "Really?" in tones of amazement.

Amazon, there really is nothing good here. There isn't a single thing to recommend this film, and so I write this as a plea to include a zero star rating. If ever a movie outside of Michael Bay's directorial career was made for a zero rating it's this pretentious, stupid, ugly, idiotic piece of non-creative, unwatchable garbage.

Yours;

Chris

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September 02, 2011
eh. I think I will continue skipping this for now...
 
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