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Battleship (2012)

A movie directed by Peter Berg

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All Hands on "Bored"....Remember This is Based on a Hasbro Board Game...'Nuff Said!

  • May 19, 2012
Let’s get some things straight. A movie based on a board game sounds theoretically stupid and honestly, I have to wonder what the filmmakers behind the 2012 film “Battleship” were thinking when they decided to make a film out of the concept of a board game. Ok, the game was fun in its own way, but obviously this movie was meant as a marketing ploy to sell a new video game or maybe re-launch the Hasbro board game. So if you are expecting something special and creative, then it would be your own fault to expect more from such a film. “Battleship” is loud and bombastic with a clichéd story and lots of action and special effects.

The film begins with setting some groundwork, as we are privy to a back story that NASA had discovered a planet similar to ours now called “Planet G” in 2005. This discovery inspires a project to send out a radio signal to that planet in another solar system in 2006. At this same time, Alex Hopper (Taylor Kitsch, 2012's John Carter) is attempting to break the ice with a woman named Samantha (Brooklyn Decker) with a chicken burrito. Fast forward to 2012, and Alex is now a naval officer under his brother, Stone (Alexander Skarsgard, True Blood) whose superior is Samantha’s father, Admiral Shane (Liam Neeson, The Grey). Boy, is Alex’s life complicated. But what happens next during a naval exercise makes everything like a walk in the park as aliens from that planet similar to ours have landed to take over the Earth. It is up to the U.S. Navy to get into an adventure that may just save the planet….

                       Alexander Skarsgard as Stone in "Battleship."

                       Tadanobu Asano as Nagata and Taylor Kitsch as Alex Hopper in ``Battleship.''

                      Rihanna as Petty Officer Raikes in "Battleship." 

“Battleship” is one movie that knew what it was supposed to be from the start. Director Peter Berg (The Rundown) keeps things simple, actually a little too simple to keep the film’s pace focused on the explosive special effects. There really is nothing creative with “Battleship”; aliens land at sea, establish a staging and communications area while keeping resistance at bay, while a few gets stuck in trying to fight off the menace. In some ways, “Battleship” reminded me of “Battle Los Angeles”. The film is not a sci-fi film but rather a military-Navy flick with glimpses of E.T. in them. But what is missing with “Battleship” is the way “Battle: L.A.” seemed to focus on the spirit of the military man. This film is indeed created to market a new toy line, so really what are we complaining about?

Ok, so “Battleship” is one film based on a board game. Well, there are barely any references to the game besides that at its middle point, there was a nice touch when the sailors of a destroyer could not see the aliens and what they did resembled the look of the board game. It was a nice touch, and the film did have some good moments of action. The film’s effects had strong similarities to the “Transformers” franchise; the explosions and the way the alien moved and looked were inspired by that Michael Bay creation. I do have to admit that the “flying guillotine’ like ‘shredder’ weapons had something clever behind them. These shredders were alien weapons that can well, shred any metal to pieces. The aliens in the film were advanced in technology, but they weren’t so advanced that they could not be confronted by our military force. I guess the writers (Jon and Eric Hoeber) wanted something to appear ‘relatable’ to the way our military is, as the planet where they came from closely resembled Earth.

                         A scene from "Battleship."

                         A scene from "Battleship."

                         A scene from "Battleship."

                        A scene from "Battleship."

The characters in this film is much more one-dimensional that there were times that I had to roll my eyes with the way they were too clichéd. Sure, there was some charm to Alex’s character with the way he fought for that chicken burrito (best pick up ever), but after that opening sequence, he becomes your regular hotshot cowboy who likes to do things on the edge. Rihanna’s character, Cora seemed a little under-utilized but she had her moments to shine in the film’s script. Liam Neeson and Skarsgard were obvious fillers to give some balance to the film’s limited script. Tadanobu Asano as Nagata gave some depth to the script even for a short time. The aliens in the film seemed to be a cross between reptiles and fish, it was a good touch since they appeared connected to our planet, but the depths of their motives and intentions were lost. The film was mostly seen from the point of view of the naval men. There is a strong feeling of nostalgia when the film seemed to showcase the courage of the military war veteran, (ala- “Space Cowboys”) and the need for an old-school steel juggernaut in the USS Missouri. Too bad, “The Art of War” references came a little too late.

                         A scene from "Battleship."

                        A scene from "Battleship."

The film does try to have a heart amid all the chaos and mayhem, but the problem was, the film spends a little too much time trying to develop single dimensions to the characters and plot, which drained all the potential excitement out of it. The perfunctory dialogue also did not help matters any. I guess you can say that the film just took a little too long to get there at 131 minutes, and when it did, I did not care anymore. Think of “Battleship” as one of those movies built for guilty fun and nothing else. It is a mere display for special effects and action that to expect more would be your own fault for disliking it. “Battleship” had its charms, but they weren’t enough for it to get anything more than a ‘rental’ advice from me.

RENTAL [2 ½ Out of 5 Stars]

Brooklyn Decker as Samantha in ``Battleship.'' Poster art for "Battleship."
All Hands on All Hands on

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May 30, 2012
I think I will wait on this one.
May 22, 2012
So Avoid this one..................... Cause its funny now I wanna see it.
May 27, 2012
what made you change your mind? My comments about that 'chicken burrito'? LOL
May 28, 2012
Honestly I really ant to see just how bad it is. But then theres the action, it looks good. BTW I love the title of your review
May 21, 2012
You can probably guess that I never wanted to see this one.
May 21, 2012
Yeah. I am still trying to figure why I did allow myself to be dragged along to see it. At least it wasn't as horrid as "Lockout" or the last two Transformers flicks. LOL
May 20, 2012
Superb writeup and pictures as usual!
May 20, 2012
thank you so much for the read!
May 21, 2012
You are very welcome.
More Battleship (2012) reviews
review by . May 16, 2012
posted in Movie Hype
         By Joan Alperin Schwartz   'Battleship' directed by Peter Berg (Hancock) has a poorly constructed script, ridiculous dialogue, cardboard charcters and it's really, really loud.        It does have bad ass aliens and some exciting visual effects, but that is not enough to save this $200,000,000 fiasco.      When the film opens, we find out that a group of …
review by . May 18, 2012
posted in Movie Hype
No doubt when people heard they were coming out with a movie based on the board game Battleship there were a lot of eye rolls and heavy sighs. Director Peter Berg of Friday Night Lights fame and the writing team of Jon and Erich Hoeber, who also wrote the Bruce Willis movie Red, heard the heavy sighs and decided to roll with it. If people are already going into this movie thinking it is going to be ridiculous then why not just go full tilt. Battleship is an overly computer …
review by . May 19, 2012
posted in Movie Hype
Star Rating:         Peter Berg’s Battleship is better than the Transformers trilogy in the same way that having a cold is better than having the flu. And yet it’s very much cut from the same cloth as Transformers, not just because both feature outer space robots but also because both are noisy, thoughtlessly inundated with action and special effects, and generally free from any semblance of plot, character development, or theme. I guess one should expect …
review by . May 18, 2012
posted in Movie Hype
There is More Entertainment Playing the Game Than in Watching the Movie
Basing a movie off of a videogame is often a risky proposition. For every “Resident Evil”, there at least a dozen others that are out and out disasters, “Mario Brothers”, “Wing Commander”, and “Double Dragon” are a few examples of how not to do it. While Hollywood shows no signs of stopping videogame adaptations anytime soon, game development companies are becoming more savvy with allowing their products to become movies and are requiring uality …
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About this movie


Battleship is an upcoming 2012 Fantasy, naval war film based on the Hasbro game of the same name. The film is being directed by Peter Berg and will be released by Universal Pictures. Starring in the film are Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsgård, Brooklyn Decker, Rihanna and Liam Neeson.
The film was originally planned to be released in 2011, but rescheduled to May 18, 2012

A story of an international Navy fleet engaged in a very dynamic and intense battle against an alien race known as "The Regents". The aliens come to planet Earth, on a mission to build a power source in the ocean. Upon their visit, they come in contact with a navy fleet. The film is also purported to show both sides of the story, from the aliens' perspective, as well as the humans' so the audience knows exactly where the opponent's ships are.

The estimated US$200 million project was to begin filming in Australia's Gold Coast in 2010, but the production company changed locale due to a lack of Australian government tax incentives.

Filming is taking place in the United States on the Hawaiian islands of Maui and Oahu, as well as in Sherman Oaks, California to do a few apartment scenes and in Playa del Rey, California where they will film a driving scene along with a shootout.[10] Battleship will also be filmed in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, United States. The Science & Entertainment Exchange provided science consultation for the film.[

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Director: Peter Berg
Genre: Action, Adventure, Fantasy, War
Release Date: 18 May 2012 (USA)
Screen Writer: Jon Hoeber, Erich Hoeber
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