YouTube has become the go-to place for everything video, easily becoming a verb in the same sense as Google to search for all things video. If you want to LYFAO, you go here and look up something as seemingly innocent as kitties. If you want to catch up on a lost episode or check out a 1950's educational film, you YouTube it. If you want to learn how-to do anything, you can search YouTube and find how-to videos on damn near everything. Here's my list of the funniest that I've seen, so far...
This friggin' guy is too friggin' much. What I can only guess is an Italian New Jersey kid, because of the thick accent, teaches you how to be a bonafide gangster. See how hardcore he is in his sidebar?
"First thing you're gonna need is shades....it don't matter if you get them from your moms" "Your gonna need some money [shows a wad with fives and some ones]"
Set-up as a 1950s Educational video about how to turn a jock into an emo kid, pure gold.
"Welcome to your new best friend, the thrift store. Billy: This place smells bad. Narrator: Billy, remember this saying, the smell of old is the smell of Emo clothes gold... Now, to pick Emo clothes, think of your dear old grandpa and mix them with your local nerd..."
"You need to learn to deal with the outside world and real Emos that might think you're a poser"
"Don't look so glum, Billy, you can make out with multiple partners to your heart's content....Billy: Oh Boy!"
"Let's say your store runs out of your favorite Soy Ice Cream, this makes you sad and ruins your day."
Here's a guy looking up a how to video and finds a how to be gangster video. I love when he smells his bandana...what in the hell is that for?
"Step 1: you have to have your dope ass flannel shirt, buttoned from the top, check out my flannel shirt...FLANNEL...is that dope or what? Also, you need to wear Dickies....hey, up here f*&^er, up here, what...you tryin' to look at my weiner or my a$$...f*&^er..."
"You gotta make sure you got your Nike Cortez's, so you can get all crazy and kick something...check that out..check that out...roundhouse kick...make sure you got the kicks or you gonna get kicked to the face...kick to the face..."
This one is an actual 1950s educational video on how to say no to all those peer pressures that you might face in life.
"Well, we're through with that guy....too chicken to pick up some dames with us. You're coming with us, aren't you, Johnny?...Wellll...."
"Happens all the time at pajama parties....we get all settled down and then...'Boy, I'm dying for a smoke, how about you girls?'....'No, I have some gum somewhere...I'd rather have a gum'...no just doesn't mean no to some people..."
"What about the problems of boys? Their hands....you know....I get this a lot....you get home from a date with some time to talk outside...some talk! You can't help getting in situations where petting is likely to start....some girls think they have to permit it for date insurance."
This girl is here to help you look like a skank...oh, no...I meant, help you trick people into thinking you're good-looking in one funny lesson after the other.
"If you were born really ugly like me, don't worry, there are steps you can take to be good-looking...kinda"
"I bleach the absolute shit out of my hair and tan my skin, because if I didn't, I would look like an albino. You can use fake self tanner, that way you can ruin all of your clothes and when it washes off, you can look like you have vitiligo."
"If you're blind as a f*&^ing bat like me,make sure you get contact lenses. Glasses are for douchbags.
I have never bought a weave but, what if I ever wanted to? How would I know what to do? Luckily for us, there's this video with the top five tips on knowing if you're weave is bad or not. I love how she uses RuPaul, a little stereotypical but, hilarious all the same. You better work it...girl...and she is working the weave and the nails.
"Girl, honey child, honey child...I tell you, you got to go to your weaveologist..."
"It's hotter than monkey doo outside..."
"It has expired. You have a weave with an expiration date and it has expired."
"That is a bad hair weave boo, you got to cover it up- wear a scarf, a hat, I don't care but cover it up...they can perm you right on up, boo."
Remember those Homies toyz that were given out in gumball machines and angered anti-gang activists? Well, here they are teaching you about how to be a player.
"My little sister, her name is Teardrop...let's pretend we're at a quincinera and she's talking to her Tia...this is what I'd say. Hey sexy, how'd you get all that into your jeans? I have velvet seats in my lowrider, you wanna go make-out? Teardrop: Oh my God, that's gross. I'm your sister...is that how you talk to girl? I'm not suprised you've never had a girlfriend."
"Hey Carnal...we're leaving. Did you finish washing my car?"
"Abuela: Mijo, it's time for lunch. Come inside. Player: Later, I'm teaching a class right now..."