Ghost Lab brings personality and cutting-edge technology to paranormal investigation. Brothers Brad and Barry Klinge, with the use of a mobile research lab and K-9 investigators, develop and test innovative theories to shed light on otherworldly … see full wiki
Oh God I've got to stop watching these shows but this one grabbed my attention because it has two things that Ghosthunters doesn't:
A ghost lab in a truck.
As fans of Ghostbusters will know, it's a very scientific business running around scaring the living brown stuff out of yourselves, and you should never, ever cross the streams.
A PhD in BS
Ghost Lab is run by the Kling-on brothers, who are pair of earnest folk from San Antonio with a truck. I think they're brothers in the blood type sense, not as "close friends". There's also a white haired old dude and a bleach-blonde groupie strapped to them like koalas. I like them as people but Jesus does their science stink.
As you might remember from dull afternoons in high school, science is about burning a peanut and seeing how many kilojoules it gives off. From what I remember, the essential equipment is a peanut and a flame, and a control peanut for eating.
The Kling-on boys have zillions of dollars of toys - I mean, enough equipment to make Halliburton have a seizure. When they're not carrying out "science and stuff" they must be at Best Buy wrestling flat-screens to the ground. Unfortunately, their experiments tend to be less scientific and more like "what happens if we throw a camel at an elephant?"
Their inability to catch anything on camera is like the A-Team's failure to hit anyone with a bullet. But there's always - sans fail - some garbled EVP that 'proves' there's a little ghosty running around. One recently claimed to be John Wilkes Boothe (you know the guy who interrupted a theater performance once). He claimed "I'm John Wilkes Boothe" so it must be true. I thought he said he was Ronald McDonald, but I don't have have a truck full of flat-screens and a groupie.
Let's get a tattoo.
While I was chewing through a control peanut, one of the shows was about a haunted tattoo parlor. What better way to ghost hunt that to get a tattoo? I have nothing more to say about that.
The Kling-on brothers are also good at running after dark shadows that never get caught on camera. Watching them run is like looking at a chihuahua on a Stairmaster.
Recently, there was one about a hotel where all the electrical outlets are unplugged by a electro-phobic ghost. With enough cameras to sink YouTube, they manage to video the house in such a way to miss every single electrical outlet. But they did put the groupie in a bathtub who heard a lamp unplug itself. What are the odds?
"The door can see into your soul!"
I have to say that I've very skeptical about electromagnetic pulse meters, EVPs and using night-vision cameras to catch ghosts. I'm not sure when these became part of the factual canon of TV ghost-hunting but I'm pretty sure they're confusing coincidence and causality. I also know it would be easy to tamper the evidence on all three and nothing you ever see on TV is real, except for Burn Notice. It's funny how foreign ghosts always leave EVP messages in English - good to see Rosetta Stone has a booming business in the afterlife.
But assuming the Kling-ons are for real, and let's face it they've blown a shitload of denarii on the truck, they must be disappointed that Zuul the gatekeeper hasn't showed up. Instead, there's always some C-list spirit closing a door or hassling the groupie. But they're at least not Grant and Jason, the all-time Kings of ghost-hunting fakery ("What was that? Something just touched my arm!"), and they're from Texas so I like 'em.