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Lunch » Tags » Books » Reviews » Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relationships » User review

Mars & Venus

  • Sep 8, 2009
Ok, it's not chocolates nor is it a nightclub! You'd think it's sweet like chocolate or exciting as a club! Well, you are wrong... it's more like sweat and a lot of hard work involved!

Welcome to the world of relationships... can't live with them, can't live without them!
That's life, my parents would say.
That's no joke, I'd say.

The world of  romance is great until a  few months down the road, you realised you both speak very different language. You proclaimed he's an alien and you'll never understand men after the many breakups you've had to go through. 



Well, here's one book that'll save you a lot of headaches. It simply costs less than 20 bucks and you'll have your AHA moments! If nothing else, it's entertaining and it's enlightening after your first read. I read it many times, especially after I said goodbye to a guy, hehe... and that makes me feel better somewhat. No, you don't need a psychiatrist who'll give you even more headaches when you see his bills. You just need this book to get over men and get on with life, hopefully, more enlightened, and finding another man whom you are now more prepared to understand ;-)

I have not managed to give this book to a man to read as I find that even for myself I've to read it a great many times to get over my preprogrammed and innate belief and way of thinking to actually "downplay" my expectation of a relationship. A relationship is between two people, granted. But if you bring in a set of expectation or as Gray terms it, baggages, into a relationship, you've no one to blame but yourself. Getting into a relationship trying to change another person to your way is NOT the way. Although the law of attractions function on the basis of similarity, the basis for a dynamic relationship is differences and not similarity. As they say in business, if a partner thinks like you, then he's not needed in the partnership. And hence, the initial attraction between a woman and man lies in differences and that's what bring us together in the first place. Yet, many a times, as a relationship grows, we have to catch ourselves from wanting our partner to be the same as us. That will spell disaster, won't it?



I love this book not for pointing out it's work for all parties concerned but for the fact that John Gray did a marvelous job of pinpointing what is on the other side of the fence. It's not that the guy is an alien, it's that he's just a frog I've kissed and has turned into a prince! Haha, after many years of being a frog, he needs to be educated and retrained to be a proper prince! ;-) And when he's one, he's the best ever! :-)
Mars & Venus

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Quick Tip by . July 04, 2010
Gray makes excellent points that bear up under scrutiny and in practice. Perhaps not the be-all and end-all, but I'll bet you that using his tips really will improve your communications with the opposite sex, and even in some same-sex relationships as well.
review by . May 24, 2010
   I began reading this book in an attempt to read a book that was non fiction and what I got  was a large dose of reality and some surprising facts as well.  This book is a well placed smack in the face for some women, especially since the author is male.      this book focuses on the basic facts like women are healers men are fixers and more. If you are Reading this book to find out the differences in men and women than this is the book for you. However, …
Quick Tip by . July 12, 2010
I liked this book. It is an interesting look at the differences between the sexes. I should probably reread it, b/c I need to grasp more of the concepts.
Quick Tip by . July 09, 2010
IT has a lot of great insights about men and women and relationships.
Quick Tip by . June 29, 2010
Good read on communications
Quick Tip by . June 23, 2010
women may now understand men but unless a man reads it, its useless
Quick Tip by . June 22, 2010
Usually I think theory satisfactorily precedes experience, for example if you're dealing with risky matters of physics like avoiding a child in the street or cutting a vegetable without drawing your own blood. But it's really impossible to conduct a human relationship rightly without fucking up five or so times. I mean, if you didn't learn from experience, what the hell do you expect to learn from a book?
Quick Tip by . June 11, 2010
How true and relevant
Quick Tip by . January 24, 2010
An excellent book about relationships and differences between the sexes which account for conflicts in relating & communicating. Must Read!
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Sharrie ()
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I'm a traveler at heart & have been nicknamed Travel Queen by friends & colleagues alike. Traveling has been my life passion for the last decade or so. As we enter a new decade, I'm excited … more
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About this book


Published in May 1992, Men are from Mars & Women are from Venus is a book by John Gray offering many suggestions for improving men-women relationships in couples by understanding the communication style and emotional needs of the opposite gender. It spawned a series of follow-on books expanding on specific situations (see below).

The book, as suggested by the title, asserts the notion that men and women are as different as beings from other planets. Gray adopts this metaphor as the central theme of all his books and seminars, likening men and women to the classical Roman god Mars and goddess Venus as ideal types.

In contrast to some psychologists (and feminists) who emphasize similarities between the sexes, Gray writes almost exclusively about differences. Gray says that his "Martians" and "Venusians" are only stereotypes and cannot be applied blindly to individuals.

An example of the theories it offers is that women complain about problems because they want their problems to be acknowledged, while men complain about problems because they are asking for solutions. Other concepts in the book are the difference between women and men's point systems and how they react under stress. 
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Author: John Gray
Genre: Communications, Family & Relationships, Hardcover, Social Psychology & Interactions, Interpersonal Relations, Love & Romance, Marriage, Marriage & Family

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