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Lunch » Tags » England » Reviews » James Bond 007: Skyfall (2012 film) » User review

'Skyfall' Starring Daniel Craig and Directed By Sam Mendes

The 23rd James Bond film directed by Sam Mendes

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Eat My Spoilers

  • Nov 22, 2012
Rating:
-1
PROS:
  • Gamboling maliciously as this flick's nefarious hacker, bleach-blonde Javier Bardem tickles a viewer's imagination with playful homoerotic intimations and histrionic harangues
  • Despite the unfortunate relative brevity of her role, luscious Gallic eurasian Bérénice Marlohe exudes more allure than any of her Anglophone castmates
  • Rich-hued, umbratic, glimmering, gorgeous photography as assured by Roger Deakins, now consequently twice absent from Coen Bros. productions
  • Dennis Gassner's production design is impeccable, a marvel of visual splendor as furnished by Anna Pinnock's aureate set decoration - a lucent floating Macau casino and provisional, subterranean MI6 headquarters are more intriguing to the eye than the plot to interest
  • Action sequences (including those which beggar the very bounds of credulity) are ably executed

CONS:
  • Craig's steely stoicism is heinously pedestrian, evoking neither the slick elan (countervailing paranoid insecurity) of Fleming's Bond, nor the character's savory facility in the best Eon productions (including Casino Royale); despite his preponderance, the lead has so little substantial dialogue to exploit that he can't be entirely faulted for such a bland performance
  • Lord save me: grievously injured in the field, Bond recuperates in the duration of a half-hour, or what seems six or seven hours packed with superfluous exposition and despondency, to the probable delight of ill-selected director Sam Mendes in light of his previous output (anything at all reminiscent of Die Another Day only bespeaks abject failure)
  • Ben Whishaw plays Bond's new quartermaster with vapid snide, wasting seven or eight or ten minutes chirping hollow patter in concern of Bond's attenuated relevance in The Digital Age (never mind that 007's utilized Internet access for six years) so to stingily issue him a pistol and thumb radio
  • Quoting Tennyson (ugh), Judi Dench recites a windy, sentimental exhortation on the enduring necessity of MI6 in address to an inquiry board, half of which narrates an action sequence, so I may as well have viewed one of those droolingly querulous Mission Impossible movies
  • Albert Finney is horribly squandered as gamekeeper of Bond's estate, who connives with Bond and M to combat mercenaries with booby traps when screenwriters Neal Purvis, Robert Wade and John Logan prove themselves incapable of concluding their narrative in accordance with human logic
  • After Bardem's laptop predictably hacks MI6's network upon inspection, Bond opts not to deliver M to one among a myriad of secure government safehouses anywhere in the expanse of the United Kingdom, but rather his family estate in rural Scotland
  • To satisfy those fans wholly bereft of imagination, Bond's history is expounded to uninspired Lucasian result
  • Nearly as soon as Naomie Harris and Ralph Fiennes areZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Oh! Pardon me. Oh, dear. He's a whit swollen in his middle age and thankfully, her hair isn't ironed herein.
  • One splendid Aston Martin DB5 is shamelessly pressed into service in replication of Connery's modified Goldfinger auto, only to be wretchedly demolished
  • As discernibly artificial as most CG, a digi-scorpion and digi-Komodo monitors provoke queries on the difficulty of wrangling these beasts
  • Theme song caterwauled by overfed and otherwise indistinguishable Adele, actually an improvement on the aural offal laxated by execrable Jack White and Alicia Keys for Quantum of Solace
  • CNN half-wit Wolf Blitzer enjoys an otiose moment of screen time

Contrived with a spare minimum of humor and invention, this Bond feature coasts on a few great performances and handsome production which can't compensate for its derisory third act. "But Robert!" some may pule, "It's the highest-grossing Bond film yet! It must be good!" Extrapolating this logic to prior outings, are we to assume that (delightfully) ludicrous Moonraker or Die Another Day were quality pictures?

Choke on your half-centenary while I view--nay, read Dr. No.

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December 05, 2012
I enjoyed your review very much! And I agree with you about its shortcomings (like taking M to Skyfall, Bardem as a blonde, and the loss of that wonderful car).
 
November 26, 2012
You know, I didn't dislike SKYFALL, but I did struggle with it an awful lot. Frankly, I was a bit surprised with all of the positive critical reviews I'd read of it after I saw it. I'll try to put my thoughts down in writing sometime soon and post something. I do place a lot of the blame on this being a bit of a craptacular film solidly on John Logan's shoulders; he has a reputation for producing craptacular films so far as I'm concerned.
 
November 22, 2012
I can't WAIT to read the James Bond novels with you! Something just occurred to me. Why is there a hacker - themed James Bond movie only NOW?! Isn't it a little late? This is a theme from the mid to late '90s! I just realised how ridiculous and uncreative it is XD The more I think about this movie, the more I believe that the writers were SO incredibly lazy that they just plopped out something easy and digestible! I love Javier Bardem in the role and his face thingie was neat, but couldn't he be some sort of non - internet villain?! M is opening VIRUS e - mail, even! LOLOLOL! Fantastic reviewsie, Snus! ^-^ Muu! ^-^ ♥ Annusya ♥
November 26, 2012
Computer hacking figured prominently in GOLDENEYE.
 
1
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About the reviewer
Robert Buchanan ()
Ranked #30
I'm a bibliophile, ailurophile, inveterate aggregator, dedicated middlebrow and anastrophizing syntax addict. My personality type is that of superlative INTJ.
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