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Beowulf (Director's Cut) (2007)

A movie directed by Robert Zemeckis

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Holding out for a hero

  • Nov 15, 2008
  • by
Rating:
+4
Hrothgar the King, he built a new hall
For frolicking, drinking and fun
He stocked it with mead, and opened the doors
And soon the par-tay had begun

Grendel the monster awakes from his sleep
Disturbed by the noise from Heorot
He slashes and slays until Hrothgar appears
And challenges him there on the spot

Grendel and Hrothgar, they stand eye to eye
Then Grendel runs off in the night
Home to his Mommy who lives in a cave
And hopes that she'll make it all right

At this point, Hrothgar decides not to tempt fate, and closes the doors to Heorot, but not before he offers half the gold in the treasury to anyone who could rid the kingdom of Grendel.

Probably quoting Bonnie Tyler, he sends a message far and wide:

"I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light
He's gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And he's gotta be larger than life"

No sooner said than done, and along comes Beowulf, strutting his stuff and promising to kill Grendel the next time he shows up. They reopen Heorot and get the karaoke going, and of course this REALLY angers Grendel. A little nude wrestling later, Beowulf finally gets to meet Grendel's mommy, who looks like she's had a full frontal silicone overdose and gets her footwear from Manolo's demonic counterpart.

Soon Beowulf gets what's coming to him, and he doesn't seem very happy about it. The high (really high) point of the movie comes with a thrilling battle between the hero and the new monster in town, where the hero learns that sometimes it costs an arm or a leg to get the job done right.

The motion capture technique doesn't always capture every expression correctly, but the characters are easily identifiable, and the action rocks!


Recommended for action fans, and for people who like to see Angelina Jolie playing Mommy to a creepy character.





Amanda Richards

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More Beowulf reviews
review by . January 11, 2011
The Story of Beowulf Rendered With PULP Re-Envisioning By Robert Zemeckis....
Everyone knows the story of “Beowulf”, most folks have read the epic poem when they were in high school, I have read the story in Bulfinch’s mythology and movies such as “Beowulf and Grendel” have portrayed the poem to a much more accurate degree albeit it was met with mixed reviews. This story (known as “Song of Beowulf” to some) may be the oldest written story in Northern Europe and was a strong part of its oral history. Eventually the story has been passed …
Quick Tip by . February 03, 2010
A flat, shallow piece of filmmaking that relies too heavily on spectacle & not enough on story. A very weak treatment of the epic poem.
review by . April 03, 2010
When I was but a callow freshman my mother, an archetypal Danish monster*, meaning well, made me sign up for a Mediaeval English Literature class. At the time this aggrieved me, but despite myself I enjoyed it immensely, and especially the really old bits - derived from Icelandic and Old High German, prominent among them Snorri Sturluson's sagas in which people ritually burn each other and the anonymous Danish legend Beowulf. It's a great story, even in its original old English (which considerably …
review by . August 08, 2008
Numerous takes have been done on the Beowulf legend, but this is probably the most expensive one to date, and surely the most ironic one to date, in that it is animated, yet primarily for adults. The twist on the story is new, Beowulf sleeps with Grendel's mother, who in turn bears a dragon as a child. Beowulf then dies while stopping the dragon from destroying his kingdom.     Several things to know before watching this movie. First of, don't let the kids watch it. The amount …
review by . January 13, 2008
posted in Movie Hype
The story of Beowulf is the oldest story of the English language. It's an epic story about a heroic man who seems capable of doing supernatural deeds. When I was a senior in high school I read Beowulf for the first time and loved the story and themes the story was about. I enjoyed reading the story even more years later in college when I had an opportunity to read a few portions in the original Old English. I enjoyed the story just as much a few later when I read Semus Heaney's translation soon …
review by . March 18, 2008
posted in Movie Hype
I am Ripper... Tearer... Slasher... Gouger. I am the Teeth in the Darkness, the Talons in the Night. Mine is Strength... and Lust... and Power! I AM BEOWULF!     Easily the best line from a movie that I can remember and this is one of the many reasons why I gave this film a 5 star rating.    For those who aren't familiar with the notion of Beowulf, let me fill you in and give you the lowdown of where it all came from. Beowulf is an epic poem without an author, …
review by . November 16, 2007
Pros: Amazing FX     Cons: May be to violent for some.     The Bottom Line: A solid film that delivers the goods.     Plot Details: This opinion reveals minor details about the movie''s plot. The classic Epic poem Beowulf has come to the big screen in a stunning CGI extravaganza under the direction of Director Robert Zemeckis.      For those not familiar with the poem, it is an ancient Danish poem that talks of the heroic …
About the reviewer
Amanda Richards ()
Ranked #41
I write reviews for a hobby. Most of my reviews are short and to the point, on account of my short attention span. I try to make my reviews both informative and entertaining, and sometimes I succeed. … more
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Wiki

Spectacular animated action scenes turn the ancient epic poemBeowulfinto a modern fantasy movie, while motion-capture technology transforms plump actor Ray Winstone (Sexy Beast) into a burly Nordic warrior. When a Danish kingdom is threatened by the monster Grendel (voiced and physicalized by Crispin Glover,River's Edge), Beowulf--lured by the promise of heroic glory--comes to rescue them. He succeeds, but falls prey to the seductive power of Grendel's mother, played by Angelina Jolie... and as Jolie's pneumatically animated form rises from an underground lagoon with demon-claw high heels, it becomes clear that we're leaving the original epic far, far behind. Regrettably, the motion-capture process has made only modest improvements sinceThe Polar Express; while the characters' eyes no longer look so flat and zombie-like, their faces remain inexpressive and movements are still wooden. As a result, the most effective sequences feature wildly animated battles and the most vivid character is Grendel, whose grotesqueness ends up making him far more sympathetic than any of the mannequin-like human beings. The meant-to-be-titillating images of a naked Jolie resemble an inflatable doll more than a living, breathing woman (or succubus, as the case may be). But the fights--particularly Grendel's initial assault on the celebration hut--pop with lushly animated gore and violence. Also featuring the CGI-muffled talents of Anthony Hopkins (Silence of the Lambs), ...
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Details

Director: Robert Zemeckis
Screen Writer: Roger Avary, Anonymous, Neil Gaiman
DVD Release Date: February 26, 2008
Runtime: 115 minutes
Studio: Paramount Home Entertainment
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