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Charlie's Angels (2000)

Action & Adventure and Comedy movie directed by McG

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CHARLIE'S ANGELS: Calling All Felons and Molesters...

  • Jul 12, 2001
  • by
Rating:
-3
Pros: writing positions for future episodes will keep our country's convicts employed

Cons: everything about the movie

The Bottom Line: They say that trash collectors can make a really good living. Well, here is a good one to start a collecting career....

Plot Details: This opinion reveals everything about the movie's plot.

They say that the average American household has declined in the last few decades. Morality has taken a back seat to entertainment. People spend more time and money on staring at a screen of various sorts than they will give to help others in true need.

Regardless of what you may think of those statements, one thing seems particularly evident these days. Class is a thing of another millenium. True high class and refined tastes are more of a rare find.

In Hollywood, they are becoming extinct.

With underpaid screenwriters threatening a strike, and talentless actors demanding exponentially more money, the inbred world of Hollywood continues to implode.

The two bit production of Charlie's Angels is one more example of the extinct nature of decent entertainment.

Starring Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, and Lucy Liu as the 3 Angels supposed to be based on the original TV show of the 1970's, the movie is anything but.

Bill Murray starring as Bosley (the silly representative of Charlie who is the liason between Charlie and the girls) is pretty much heretical, if you are a fan of the former TV show CHARLIE's ANGELS


BASIC PREMISE OF THE MOVIE
Plot? Not much. The 3 cheap trampy bimbos who seem to be a cross between the SIMPSONS, BEAVIS AND BUTTHEAD, and CLUELESS characters are asked to save a guy from kidnapping and get back the technical secrets stolen as a result.

So they kickbox their way out of things, charge like a bad MATRIX attempt and act like 3 chicks out to be as slimy and low life as you can get.

Drew Barrymore looks more like "JOSIE GROSSIE" from NEVER BEEN KISSED than any kind of hip detective.

Cameron Diaz acts more like Pookie( is that the dog's name?) on GARFIELD comic strips than a person you would want in your company let alone to save your life. So, she does a lot of unbelievable handsprings and stunts. Big deal.

Lucy Liu is , well, acceptable as a kick boxing detective, but her ethics and class is bottom of the barrel. She attempts to be the brains of the operation. She is just slightly higher than the rest. Perhaps her oriental look gives her that small edge. She is tolerable.

Bill Murray as Bosley? The original Bosley was annoying. Bill Murray can not even pull that off well. But, running true to his boring form, Bill Murray does about as well as I expected.

BOTTOM LINE

There is a lot of blowing up. Unrealistic superhuman scenes of brainless trashy women flying through the air and bashing huge guys while non-chalantly talking on the phone or doing some other thing.

The clothes were mildly interesting on occasion. Once in a while. Nice black dress. Hard to bore me in that department, but they did it in this movie.

Quite frankly, it disturbs me to even discuss this film more than I have to. It merits no more than I HAVE to give it.

The insinuations, bold sexual slurs, trashy comments and obsession with every topic being a potty or genitally related topic is insulting, boring and disgusting. This falls way beneath 7th grade humor.

It seems that the assorted groups of writers used to make this film were most likely found incarcerated in a local jail. Or perhaps to be politically correct, they were from several jails around the country to make it more ecumenical.

After washing myself off from the slime of such a low rate picture, I did manage to see a bright side. If the Hollywood writer's strike does take place, perhaps all of the incarcerated people can make a significant contribution to society.

Not a good one, but significant anyway. Then they could donate the income to charity. Like to help abused and assaulted women?

Or the children who will be subjected to such assaults as having to watch such substandard junk......

Maybe start a CHILDREN'S LEGAL DEFENSE FUND for all of the little boys that are brought up on sexual assault charges for quoting the vile lines they saw in this movie to the little girls they know. Think of the possibilities....


Whoopee!

I would not recommend this to my worst enemy. May give them ideas on how to assault, insult, abuse or molest more people - especially in the department of degrading women.



Recommended:
No

Viewing Format: VHS
Video Occasion: None of the Above
Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age
Special Effects: Well at least you can't see the strings

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More Charlie's Angels (2000 movie) reviews
review by . December 05, 2003
posted in Movie Hype
Pros: funny; great chemistry within the cast; good direction; FABULOUS stunts     Cons: The stupid theatre wasn't THX     The Bottom Line: This is one of my favorite flicks.     Alright, alright... Maybe I'm jumping the gun (no pun intended) when I say that Charlie's Angels is my new favorite film. My favorites still remain A League of Their Own, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey and Army of Darkness, but Charlie's …
review by . March 02, 2002
posted in Movie Hype
One would think by reading the majority of the critical reviews, CHARLIE'S ANGELS is a great movie adaptation of the 1970s television show. Well, don't think that. CHARLIE'S ANGELS is NOT a great adaptation of the television show in which it was based. Yes, the movie has lots of jiggle and action and the plot is believable (though it's a rip off of MISSION:IMPOSSIBLE). However, the movie is totally uninspired.Cameron Diaz and Drew Barrymore are the only people in the film who actually look like …
review by . December 01, 2000
Pros: Funny, good action.     Cons: No real story.     In the time honored tradition of it it was a hit once, it will be again, Hollywod   has been mining classic tv shows for years and bringing them to the big screen.   Some films such as "The Brady Bunch", "The Addams Family", and "Maverick" were   big hits. Other like "Car 54 Where are you?" and "The Wild Wild West" have been   …
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About this movie

Wiki

For every TV-into-movie success likeThe Fugitive, there are dozens of uninspired films likeThe Mod Squad. Happily--and surprisingly--this breezy update of the seminal '70s jiggle show falls into the first category, with Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore (who also produced), and Lucy Liu starring as the hair-tossing, fashion-setting, kung fu-fighting trio employed by the mysterious Charlie (voiced by the original Charlie, John Forsythe). When a high-tech programmer (Sam Rockwell) is kidnapped, the angels seek out the suspects, with the daffy Bosley (Bill Murray in a casting coup) in tow. A happy, cornball popcorn flick,Charlie's Angelsis played for laughs with plenty of ribbing references to the old TV show as well as modern caper films likeMission: Impossible. McG, a music video director making his feature film debut (usually a death warrant for a movie's integrity), infuses the film with plenty ofMatrix-style combat pyrotechnics, and the result is the first successful all-American Hong Kong-style action flick. Plenty of movies boast a New Age feminism that has their stars touting their sexuality while being their own women, but unlike something as obnoxious asCoyote Ugly,Angelssucceeds with a positive spin on Girl Power for the new millennium (Diaz especially sizzles in her role of crack super agent/airhead blonde). From the send-up of the TV show's credit sequence to the outtakes over the end credits,Charlie's Angelsis a delight.--Doug Thomas
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Details

Director: McG, Joseph McGinty
Genre: Action, Adventure
Release Date: 2000
MPAA Rating: PG-13
DVD Release Date: May 27, 2003
Runtime: 98 minutes
Studio: Sony Pictures
First to Review

"Not bad at all."
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