|
Movies Books Music Food Tv Shows Technology Politics Video Games Parenting Fashion Green Living more >

Lunch » Tags » Movies » Reviews » Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull » User review

action! adventure! charm! thrills! cheesy piece of crap!

  • Dec 17, 2008
  • by
Rating:
-5

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull opens with a CGI prairie dog. I'm not 100% sure that the rodent is CGI, but it might as well be. I guess it's a little bit cute, but it's mostly like:  Are you kidding me?

And believe it or not, it's all downhill from there.

Plenty of ado has been made of Harrison Ford's advanced age (65), but I think it might be Steven Spielberg that needs to be checked for senility. Because I can't understand how or why this movie was made and how or why it was so bad. Ford is actually a bright spot, in all his creakiness (he looks great for 65, by the way) — but nearly ever other element is weak. Shia LaBeouf? More like Shia LaDork. How is this mop top doofus supposed to be Indy's offspring? Karen Allen is passable returning as Marion, but the tête-à-tête that she and Indy engage in is tired and forced.

Even Cate Blanchett's perfectly tuned icy communism can't fill in plot holes and wild tangents that are fiercely irritating.

The crystal skull that they seek and carry with them for the duration of the movie looks like something you would buy at the Sharper Image if you were somehow forced to spend money at the Sharper Image.

The only parts that worked for me were the really repellent bug scenes that made me squirm and the occasional quip from Indy that made me smile.  Otherwise, this movie is an exercise in truly horrible filmmaking and was nothing but boring and lame.

It's going to make a great ride, though.

What did you think of this review?

Helpful
9
Thought-Provoking
0
Fun to Read
1
Well-Organized
0
Post a Comment
January 28, 2009
I don't get the whole thing with this kid. I never thought anyone could make Leonardo DiCaprio look manly. I get the last name, it means "the beef", but what's with this Shia stuff? Sharper Image went out of business long ago.
 
December 19, 2008
I want to make sweet, sweet love to Shia. I have a giant picture of him taped to my desk. Yes, like a 13 yr old girl would.
 
1
More Indiana Jones and the Kingdom ... reviews
review by . May 02, 2011
You know how The Last Crusade was a step in the right direction for Indiana Jones after the disappointing sequel? Well, this is another step, a re-step if you will in the wrong direction, and easily the worst film in one of the greatest series of all time. This film brings the good old-school action and must have been quite the breath of fresh air at the time it came out, but it's still very disappointing and has very questionable special effects, plus one plot element that ruined the entire …
review by . November 17, 2010
So, based on some reviews I've read and comments I've seen from viewers on TV...apparently INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDON OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL is supposed to have been a life-changing movie. At least a groundbreaking film sure to vault to "all-time classic" status. Because there sure are a lot of disappointed viewers around.     If, however, you have the more reasonable expectation of a highly-entertaining, highly-implausible action film that hearkens back to the "cliff-hanger" …
review by . May 23, 2008
Had I known then what I know now I would have passed on seeing this movie and settled for a root canal or possibly done my taxes again.    The idea of bringing Indiana Jones back to the big screen is a great one, one that can appeal to both the young and old. However when the rubber hits the road this movie is a disaster. There is zero character development, and the storyline is incredibly lame.    Lucas has done it again, like Star Wars, he has taken a great …
review by . February 23, 2010
A little different for Indiana Jones, but still a solid entry
Well it's not as good as Raiders of the Lost Ark or The Last Crusade, but Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of Crystal Skull is still better then The Temple of Doom and will stand proud with its predecessors as a solid action flick living up to an American icon. This long awaited final chapter to the story of treasure hunter Harry "Indiana" Jones Jr. may not live up to the greatness which were the first and third entries, but don't let a simple comparison ruin the fun of this fourth movie; …
Quick Tip by . July 13, 2010
posted in Movie Hype
not worth your time if you value the original trilogy of indiana jones movies
Quick Tip by . June 11, 2010
Aliens? Are you serious?
review by . December 17, 2008
posted in Movie Hype
Looking for clues as to why this films sucks.
WARNING: This review contains spoilers!      After 19 years, Indiana Jones returns to the silver screen in what may be Steven Spielberg's worst film ever (or until now, anyway). Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is a bust. The screenplay was amateurishly written and the film itself is directed with juvenile enthusiasm. The overall mood of the picture doesn't even feel like that of Indiana Jones, but rather more like National Treasure, The Mummy Returns or …
review by . April 23, 2009
Looking back at my childhood in South London, the fact my parents had no money and worked very hard for very little was tempered by the escape from reality afforded me by film. And as a child, the films that stood out above all else, that revealed another world of possibility and adventure, were Indiana Jones and Star Wars. I've also probably seen The Neverending Story a hundred times too, but the enduring quality of Indiana Jones meant that even last year we dropped $60 on the box trilogy set to …
Quick Tip by . April 01, 2010
Jumped the shark the moment the Indiana Jones survived the nuclear blast.
Quick Tip by . November 19, 2009
Utterly Disappointing attempt by Spielberg! I won't even bother writing a full review for this one...
About the reviewer
Gillian ()
Ranked #439
I am a dreamer, drinker, blogger, tall chick, sarcasm aficionado, sushi snob, bargain shopper, member of the Trojan family, class act, repeat offender, good speller, domain buying addict, dog owner, fan … more
Consider the Source

Use Trust Points to see how much you can rely on this review.

You
ProfessionalLush
Your ratings:
rate more to improve this
Recent reviews by ProfessionalLush
About this movie

Wiki

Nearly 20 years after riding his last Crusade, Harrison Ford makes a welcome return as archaeologist/relic hunter Indiana Jones inIndiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, an action-packed fourth installment that's, in a nutshell, less memorable than the first three but great nostalgia for fans of the series. Producer George Lucas and screenwriter David Koepp (War of the Worlds) set the film during the cold war, as the Soviets--replacing Nazis as Indy's villains of choice and led by a sword-wielding Cate Blanchett with black bob and sunglasses--are in pursuit of a crystal skull, which has mystical powers related to a city of gold. After escaping from them in a spectacular opening action sequence, Indy is coerced to head to Peru at the behest of a young greaser (Shia LaBeouf) whose friend--and Indy's colleague--Professor Oxley (John Hurt) has been captured for his knowledge of the skull's whereabouts. Whatever secrets the skull holds are tertiary; its reveal is the weakest part of the movie, as the CGI effects that inevitably accompany it feel jarring next to the boulder-rolling world of Indy audiences knew and loved. There's plenty of comedy, delightful stunts--ants play a deadly role here--and the return ofRaiderslove interest Karen Allen as Marion Ravenwood, once shrill but now softened, giving her ex-love bemused glances and eye-rolls as he huffs his way to save the day. Which brings us to Ford: bullwhip still in hand, he's a little ...
view wiki

Details

Director: Steven Spielberg
Genre: Action, Adventure
Release Date: May 22, 2008
MPAA Rating: PG-13
DVD Release Date: October 14, 2008
Runtime: 122 minutes
Studio: Paramount
Polls with this movie
Poster

Steven Spielberg Films

by

First to Review
© 2014 Lunch.com, LLC All Rights Reserved
Lunch.com - Relevant reviews by real people.
()
This is you!
Ranked #
Last login
Member since
reviews
comments
ratings
questions
compliments
lists