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Spring Breakdown

A movie directed by Ryan Shiraki

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Most Sensual Moment - the Cover Art

  • Jun 26, 2009
  • by
Spring break movies, there's a formula, nerd wants to lose their virginity, they throw all caution to the wind, go to Spring Break in Florida or Padre Island in Texas (glad the movie told me that), there is all kinds of drinking, nakedness, coupling, drinking, nakedness, coupling, drinking, and the virgin grows up and realizes they didn't mean to do that in the first place. Good formula right?

Well Spring Breakdown - gets very broken down along the way and forgets this critical formula. Yes, there's a bunch of geeks in the movie, Amy Poehler, Rachel Dratch, and Parker Posey are the lead three nerds. There are three dopelgangers that these three follow to Padre. They all get there, and guess what, the formula jumps the shark - there's no nakedness, no coupling, but there is drinking and Amy Poehler going WOOOOOWOOOOOWWOOOOOO a whole bunch. There's no funny jokes, there's no comedic situations, there's no real conflict, there's no Annette Funicello or Franky Valley dancing; there's no pole dacing; there's no girls gone wild.... It's all boring, way boring. Like you are the only one sober at a party of nothing but drunks.

The first clue this one will be a stinker was in the opening montage. Three thirty year old women stand on stage playing True Colors, the Cyndi Lauper song. They get finished and bow; reverse cut to the crowd; and this is supposed to be a high school talent show. Hey, why did the teachers perform? Oh no, these three were supposed to be high school students. I'm a bad judge of age, but dang, these three must have flunked about 15 maybe 20 years in a row to still be there. Ouch, it was awful. None of them can sing. And they all looked horrifically bad.

So there's no jiggle. There's no sensual moments. What are we left with? A really bad shell of a film that isn't funny at all. No tension, no conflict, no caring for the characters (hey come on, when Parker Posey's cat died and she called it Honey - it was like pitiful Monica near the end of Friends...ouch horrible, and who cared), no titilation.... just a boring grind. The geeks beat the popular kids, yipeeee!

The DVD has deleted scenes, a gag reel, commentary by the director and Rachel Dratch (Debbie Downer from Saturday Night Live), and trailers. Oh it's a bad set of bonus features. The only funny, maybe should be included was an extended scene with Rachel and Seth Meyer at the marriage counselor where it becomes clear he is gay. That scene was kind of funny.

No just avoid this one. The only thing really worth looking at, the cover art. It's rated R for some reason, certainly not nudity.

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More Spring Breakdown reviews
review by . July 18, 2010
posted in Movie Hype
This is one in a long line of recent comedies about adults acting like a bunch of teenagers. Spring Breakdown is at least a somewhat better comedy in that at least it's funny at some point and isn't as vulgar as most of what passes for comedy these days. The three women have different responses to reliving spring break, from trying to win popularity contests to refusing to conform. Rachel Dratch plays a particularly funny role with her dry humor.
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Dan lebryk ()
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About this movie


Both a raucous party movie and comic vehicle for three talented actresses,Spring BreakdownstarsSaturday Night Liveveterans Rachel Dratch and Amy Poehler along with independent-film mainstay Parker Posey. The wish-list cast does a lot with a throwaway story about longtime friends whose social failures back in college are somewhat redeemed during a spring break spent with students in Mexico. Feebly chaperoning Ashley (Amber Tamblyn), daughter of the next U.S. vice-president (Jane Lynch in another of her funny, outsize performances), Posey's Becky--who brings Dratch's Judi and Poehler's Gayle along--heads for the beach and many quasi-orgies fueled by alcohol, wet T-shirt contests, and the like. While Becky steers the reserved Ashley toward less provocative activities, Gayle finds herself adopted as den mother to a gaggle of blonde hotties and Judi begins to think maybe there's more to life than being engaged to a gay boyfriend (Seth Meyers). There is certainly a lot to like about scenes involving any or all of the film's three stars, though the rest ofSpring Breakdownlooks like it could have been shot for any post-Animal Housecollege movie. The film, co-written by Dratch, also features Missi Pyle in an expertly comic role as another older woman who latches onto the craziness.--Tom Keogh
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Director: Ryan Shiraki
DVD Release Date: June 2, 2009
Runtime: 84 minutes
Studio: Warner Home Video
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