If you kept tabs with George Carlin's jokes in the last 2-3 years before he died, his main theme was that American civilization is on a steep decline and will shortly collapse over how people willingly look over the important things in life so they can indulge in cellphones that make pancakes or brain-rotting reality TV. Too bad he's dead because I would love to hear his opinion on motherfucking air guitar championships.
I try not to dwell much on the idea that civilization is on the verge of collapse, but sometimes, I think the fact people actually have championships for something that anyone with functional arms and ears can do proficiently makes me think that the human race's time on Earth is dwindling fast, especially since people can actually win money for this.
I can air guitar almost perfectly to Nocturnus's "Neolithic" and Dark Angel's "The Burning of Sodom," but I don't deserve any sort of fame or monetary gain for it, because it's not a skill that requires any inkling of effort to master at all. Fuck, I made really shitty Sonic the Hedgehog fanfiction when I was 10 years-old that required a lot more creativity and effort than pretending to play guitar to my favorite songs.
Anyone that passes off actual musicians (whether they're metal guitarists, rap vocalists, prog-rock keyboardists, funk bassists etc.) just to go gaga over talentless hacks pretending to play an instrument should do the genepool a favor and guzzle down whole bottles of Liquid Plumber.
There is so much good to be found in this little gem of video footage. It is almost enough to give you hope in the coming generation. This self-proclaimed champion lives up to the bill and then some. He powers through this auto-filmed video for a full 4 minutes, which is an eternity in air guitar circles. The hair, bandanna, and swagger all call to mind a young Robert Plant, although it is Jimmy Page that is so deftly showcased here. Instead of picking … more