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The House of Quark

Star Trek: DS9 #49 The House of Quark

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KAIOS: Killer Accounting In Outer Space

  • Oct 2, 2010

The story?

This is a fascinating story in multiple ways.  Quark claims to have killed a drunken obnoxious Klingon, named Kozak, in combat when actually he fell on his knife because he was so drunk.  Of course he could have just as accidentally killed Quark.  But that would have been much less interesting.

How much did you see your favorite character?

My favorite DS9 character is Garak but he did not appear in this episode.  He could have killed a Klingon and no one would have known who did it.  Wait, maybe he did do it and we don't even know it.

Was the antagonist strong?  Evil?

The antagonist in this story was D'Ghor.  Odo warns Quark that the Klingon's family may come seeking revenge.  D'Ghor comes to DS9 and corners Quark in a dark corridor claiming to be Kozak's brother.  He threatens to kill Quark if Kozak died in an accident, so he encourages Quark to lie.  But later another stranger comes to ask Quark about the fight.  But this time it turns out to be Kozak's wife and she threatens to kill Quark in armed combat.  Quark admits to the lie and she, Grilka, drugs Quark and kidnaps him.  When Quark wakes up he is on Chronos, the Klingon home world. 

Quark has been dragged into the strange illogical world of Klingon politics.  D'Ghor has been trying to take over Kozak's house and owns most of his debt.  Grilka can lose the house if Kozak died in honorable combat.  So Grilka forces Quark into a shotgun wedding.  No, make that, knife to the throat wedding.  So Quark's lie has made him the head of a Klingon house.  But what does the "happy couple" do next?  Yes dear, no dear, whatever you say dear.  LOL

This story is very interesting as a study of the psychologies of Klingons and Ferengi.  They are just a bit different.  Can you imagine a Klingon showing up at a boring 9 to 5 job for 40 years.  NO!  He would probably just kill his boss.  I don't think Klingons could run a technological culture much less invent one.  They make for a fun Star Trek species though, if not a sentient one.

But much of this story comes down to a little economic warfare which is really Feringi territory.  So actually Grilka found the right man for the job.  But Quark explaining guerrilla accounting to the Klingon high council requires a slightly arcane sense of humor to appreciate.  But it forces D'Ghor to resort to a more Klingonesque defensive strategy.  Off with the offending head!

But it looks like today's world is the result of badly played economic wargames.  Considering that double-entry accounting is 700 years old and cheap computers are everywhere it is certainly rather odd.  Our educators have not been smart enough to suggest that accounting be mandatory in high school during the last 50 years.  Now the high school  and college graduates must confront the results.  How much have Americans lost on depreciation of automobiles over the last 50 years?  Quark, explain depreciation to Gowron!

So now we have economic CHAOS instead of alien KAIOS.


Live long and prosper with KAIOS!

KAIOS: Killer Accounting In Outer Space KAIOS: Killer Accounting In Outer Space KAIOS: Killer Accounting In Outer Space

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October 03, 2010
This is a great episode and one of those times where Quark's heart of brass turns gold when he realizes theres more important things then money-which shows what time away from other Ferengi dealings has done to him. That scene in the great hall where all the Klingons are punching away on calculators (including Gowron with his great sunken bug eyes) is great.
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A lone drunken Klingon in Quark's gets into a dispute with the proprietor over his bar tab. Quark, who is already upset over the bellicose threats of the Dominion and their negative impact on his business, prepares to eject the surly patron. The enraged Klingon attacks Quark but stumbles and falls on his own dagger, dead. Hoping to lure back customers, Quark claims to have killed the Klingon in combat, and earns a great deal of notoriety. Odo informs him that the Klingon was Kozak, leader of a powerful Klingon house, and warns that Kozak's relatives may come seeking vengeance. Sure enough, Quark is confronted in a corridor by another Klingon, D'Ghor, who claims to be Kozak's brother. D'Ghor asks how Kozak died, and threatens to kill Quark if Kozak did not die "honorably". Quark tries to tell the truth, but quickly realizes that it is not what D'Ghor wants to hear. With a dagger at his throat, Quark assures D'Ghor that his brother died honorably in battle.

Kozak's widow Grilka arrives in Quark's bar, asking for him. No sooner does Quark offer her a refreshment than she lunges forward with a dagger; a terrified Quark dives over the bar and hides himself behind a serving tray. Grilka knows such a cowardly Ferengi would be no match for her late husband, and asks if Quark wants to revise his story. Quark admits the truth, at which point he is tranquilized and abducted.

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