What do you get when you cross moronic inbred hillbillies with what appears to be a genuinely decent and intelligent man? You get The Jerry Springer Show, which is a talk show that takes inbred morons and makes them do tricks for its equally puerile audience. The difference between The Jerry Springer Show and a circus that features animals is that the animals hold more intelligence than the shows guests.
Deep in accusations of fakery and debauchery, there is nothing obvious that can be said about this show which can be perceived as a compliment. Jerry Springer himself, although not exactly an innocent party in this fiasco, seems about the only possibly respectable person involved in the entire thing. After a few embarrassing naked fights and copious uses of gratuitous language, Jerry Springer makes a redeeming change from the ringmaster of idiots to rational sympathiser with his final thoughts.
I know tabloid American TV is quite possibly the most soulless form of entertainment in the world today and gives good ammo for the American haters to justify their rage. But there has to come a point in which human morals overtake ratings and sponsorship hunger; unfortunately the producers of the Springer show do not seem to have any remnants of a soul.
Exploitation is the word I'm looking for. The shows producers exploit stupid people; I'm sure with the promise that if they bring their troubles to TV land, then the magic of Jerry Springer will help them resolve those problems. These poor and equally shameless people come on this show and are given quotas to meet i.e. fights, amount of skin to show and number of swear words to use. What do the producers do to trigger these brawls of obese idiots? They ring a bell and let them have at it for a few seconds before the law tells the producers that they must split them up.
I like Jerry Springer the man. Out of the circus setting and away from the ringmaster role, he seems like a genuinely nice, intelligent and all round respectable gentleman. I'm sure the people of Cincinnati are somewhat embarrassed to think that their once elected mayor went on to host one of the most humiliating depictions of human exploitation of the 20th century. Forget Guantanamo Bay, why not have a TV show where you torture the unproven to be guilty detainees live on air by bringing a stupid obese inbred to give them a lap dance. I'm sure the loyal Springer audience would love that idea.
So I'm sure you're wondering two things by now. Firstly, what the hell is he talking about and secondly, what could be worse than the Jerry Springer Show? Well the answer to the second question is quite easy. The Steve Wilkos Show, a spin-off of Springer in which one of his former security guards attempts to make a Springer-esque show but with a more serious tone. However, what he did create was an image of a host being a bullying, equally cretinous moron who decides that he can solve such problems as paedophilia and rape by towering over his guests and yelling at them for half an hour while his equally stupid and righteous crowd clap in seal like fashion waiting for a fish to be thrown to them.
What should you learn from this review? Don't even waste your time thinking "what's all the Jerry Springer fuss about?" Because you will just find yourself feeling robbed of any sense of decency you once held.
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