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Worst Infomercials of 2010

  • Jun 7, 2011
It's always a good thing to remember where you came from. That's why we're looking back on the worst (best, really) infomercials of yesteryear and fondly reminiscing the first time we learned of their wonderful promises to improve our lives in some fashion. 
1
Shake Weight for Men

I know exactly what you're thinking. And I agree--they need to use the shake weight to work out their buttocks.
2
Fushigi Ball

I was blown away by this 1337 (that's leet, for you non-dorks) magical sphere of awesomeness when I first saw it on TV last year. "They're finally selling REAL MAGIC!" I thought to myself. Plus, it's supposed to be therapeutic, so really, everyone should be doing it all the time, everywhere, even in your sleep. Because it's therapeutic.
3
AS SEEN ON TV! Bark Off (Telebrands)
YES! Finally, a loophole for animal abuse enthusiasts like me.  Humane ultrasonic sound waves? FULL BLAST BABY. Pesky dogs need to know their place and stop yapping over every little 'zomgs!'.
4
Pajama Jeans

They look like designer denim jeans, people! I can finally one-up my True Religion and Diesel Jean-wearing friends. Smooth, butt-lifting design, eh? That'll give me the perfect boost to the butt pads I already use! And who doesn't want a sexy second skin? Did we learn nothing from The Silence of the Lambs?

AND a grey crewneck t-shirt?? Groupon couldn't offer a better deal.
5
Boom-a-Ring

O-M-G. That might be the most perfect infomercial ever. Clever lyrics to replace the boring, old version of "Jingle Bells," a Santa Claus on acid, and a throwback to the handheld corded phone! It's truly the best of all worlds.
6
Couch Commander

Another brilliant concoction of the human mind! Every crack should be filled by a couch commander, including your own! And you can prove to your friends how well it works by letting your kids bounce up and down on your back.
7
Better Marriage Blanket

This is DEFINITELY a very real problem and clearly necessitates the use of advanced technology used by the army, obviously. Have you tested the toxicity level of your partner's flatulence? IT COULD KILL YOU, just like the chemical weapons used in war.
8
Cami Secret
Camisole? Cami-SECRET! I would've paid $5 quadrillion for that ingenious name. Cleavage is SUCH a nuisance, I tell ya. Unless it's being occupied by a couch commander, it's just unsightly. But thanks to Cami Secret, you can choose from an array of colors to hide your boobage AND make the other girls feel better about themselves. Well done!
9
Shoe Dini



























Bending over sucks. Just ask your congressman's intern. That's why this telescopic shoe horn is a GODSEND. No more reaching for your far-away feet to slip on your shoes. And though they don't advertise this, you can also use it as a whacking stick! Particularly useful for when your child doesn't properly hold down your shoes for you as you're slipping them on.
10
Cindy Crawford's Meaningful Beauty Skin Care
Oh Cindy Crawford, you are so not getting the attention you deserve these days in Hollywood. Perhaps it's because no one else is as meaningfully beautiful as you are. That is, after all, why you created this product, right? I know I'll be the talk of the town (which is to say, my farm in FarmVille) after I slather on your magic youth juice. Or is it an injection? I don't care, I just want to be as purrty as you, Cindy!

What did you think of this list?

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Post a Comment
July 16, 2011
People buy this stuff or they wouldn't be on TV. Imagine the lives of people sitting on their couches with their couch commanders. Very funny but rather sad.
 
July 13, 2011
Very cool....very cool indeed.
July 13, 2011
Thanks for reading, Will!
 
July 13, 2011
Genius! Total genius! And very funny too... :-D
July 13, 2011
Thanks! Great compliment coming from you, ^_^
 
July 09, 2011
I like this one, that comes up from time to time on various religious channels
 
Greetings folks!! We are pleased to send you a complimentary membership in the Praise Us Lord Church of Groomed Hair based in Piety, Georgia. Our little town contains 279 souls, not counting, of course, the love offspring of brothers and sisters. I mean real brothers and sisters. This membership carries an annual value of $2,200 and includes a color photograph recently taken of Our Lord blessing the sacred bunnies of Bethlehem. Pastor Buff and his wife, Tiffany, are also offering a prayer special this July. For a modest $59.99, Pastor Buff and Tiffany will send direct to God a prayer in your name guaranteed to double your net income and clear up that nasty case of psoriasis. This prayer normally is available only with an offering of $79.99. Tiffany would like to point out that not only does your contribution insure your personal success and health, but you also will receive without charge a bottle of Tiffany’s special-formula Weep Without Shame For The Children mascara. An additional $19.99 for postage and handling will guarantee your prayer goes direct to God and will not be delayed by those onerous and disrespectful inspections recently instituted by Barak Obama at the Pearly Gates.
July 13, 2011
Signing a friend up for that would be an AWESOME prank, hah.
 
July 07, 2011
Dude, that guy did not get all those muscles from using a Shake Weight, but he did get some... other skills. And lol at that better marriage blanket. Seriously?
July 13, 2011
I know! I would buy it for my married friends (all zero of them) just to be able to tell them what it's called.
 
July 07, 2011
Your list is hilarious!!! The only one of these I ever saw is the shake weight and totally agree that it is lame. From the photo, the guy got that big muscular body from using the product. Yes of course! What gullible idiots do these marketers think the general public is? Maybe they are. lol.
July 13, 2011
Hah, terrible idea it may be, it ended up offering gold in comic material for many years to come, =]
 
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Tu Nguyen ()
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